The way to a (geeky, crimefighting, mission-obssessed) man’s heart be like…

Tam: Tim, I understand your apprehension, but let me appeal to the detective in you.

Tam: Given the five-week end date, isn’t it the perfect opportunity to consider this an investigation and collect evidence on our compatibility?

Tim:

Tim: Don’t try to lure me in with sexy talk, woman.

Family Patrol Night…

Red Hood and Red Robin: *replaying (for the nth time) a clip of Robin accidentally tripping on his shoelaces, falling off a ledge, and hanging upside-down from a skyscraper*

Red Robin: You can’t put that on Snapchat.

Red Hood: Fine, I’ll put it on Facebook like a caveman.

Mornings at the Manor…

Tim: *stumbles into the kitchen wearing the same shirt for the third day in a row*

Jason:

Tim: *pours himself a fifth espresso shot into a saucer*

Jason: *blinks*

Tim: You know, I once ordered an Uber by accident. I just got in it and went somewhere.


Yeah, that was just two hours ago, Timmy.

Red Robin: *jumps in through the Batmobile window in the middle of a high-speed car chase with a criminal*

Red Hood: *driving*

Red Robin: You left me!

Red Hood: *pulls Tim in*

Red Hood: No, I merely tried to!


You also might wanna try to explain to Bruce how you managed to hotwire the freakin’ Batmobile while he was away on a JL mission, Jay.

When you overstay your welcome at Red Hood’s safe house…

Jason: *hopping over mounds of bloody patrol suits and broken weapons while picking up dirty dishes*

Tim and Damian: *playing Injustice 2 on Xbox while yelling threats at each other*

Dick: *pouring milk on his cereal and spilling some on the carpet*

Jason: I don’t know when I became a dad to three lazy teenagers, but it stops today. You guys are cleaning this place up, top to bottom!

Dick: Hey, we don’t even live here!

Jason: Yes or no, do you have clothes in my laundry right now?