Damian: *guarding the door at Red Robin’s Nest*
Tim: *on a gurney*
Jason: *knocks*
Damian: *opens the door* Todd, this really isn’t the best time. Drake is pretty sick.
Jason: Oh, no. Poor Timbo. Is Damian taking good care of you?
Tim: Not really.
Jason: Would you like me to take care of you?
Tim: Not really.
Where’re Alfred and Dick when you need ‘em?
When Red Robin comes back to the land of the living…
Tim: Okay, um, well, I’m thankful that I can spend my first day back with all the people I love and all the people who love me… and Damian.
Jason: *picks up a piece of paper by the phone*
Jason: Timbo, what’s this? A phone message?
Tim: Yeah. Some dude called for you.
Jason: Who? I can’t read your handwriting.
Tim: *reads the message out loud* “You’re a big, selfish jerk.”
Jason: Okay, I know who it is.
Tim: Probably Roy.
Jason: Yup, Roy.
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *pops open a can of beer*
Damian: If drinking makes you feel bad, why do you drink, Todd?
Jason: Nobody likes a smart ass, kid.
Damian: You have to put a dollar in the swear jar. You said “ass”.
Jason: Tell you what. Here’s a twenty. That ought to cover me until lunch.
When Red Robin comes back to the land of the living…
Jason [to Tim]: Look at you! All grown up and back living with Bruce… How good do you feel about yourself right now, on a scale from one to two?
Jason: How are you doing?
Tim: Same as always
Jason: Wow, that bad?
Spoiler: It’s like that science thing: for every action, you have a gigantic and annoying reaction.
Red Robin: Just when I thought you couldn’t get any hotter…
Jason [to Dick]: Hey, look at that. You’ve got a Wally, I’ve got a Roy. Maybe we should take them to the park and let them run around together.
Oh, and Tim’s got a Conner and Damian’s got a Jon.
When asked how the eighteen-hour flight with his brother went…
Damian: It was fine, other than the weird-tasting juice Drake gave me. I slept the whole way.
When “I’m telling Batman” is the sweetest revenge for all the noogies and wedgies…
Red Hood: So, you’re gonna throw me under the bus?
Red Robin: I’m gonna throw you so hard, I’ll probably win a stuffed animal.
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