When your pesky little brother comes over to your safe house…
Damian: *shuts the refrigerator door*
Jason: What are you smiling about?
Damian: *smirks* You don’t have any food.
Jason: Yeah, but I’m not the one who’s hungry. Who’s smiling now, shorty?
Jason: How are you doing?
Tim: Same as always
Jason: Wow, that bad?
Jason [to Dick]: Hey, look at that. You’ve got a Wally, I’ve got a Roy. Maybe we should take them to the park and let them run around together.
Oh, and Tim’s got a Conner and Damian’s got a Jon.
When your best friend’s father figure troubles remind you of your own father figure troubles…
Arsenal: I spoke with Batman, and he made me feel better.
Red Hood: I don’t know who you talked to, but that wasn’t Batman.
When “I’m telling Batman” is the sweetest revenge for all the noogies and wedgies…
Red Hood: So, you’re gonna throw me under the bus?
Red Robin: I’m gonna throw you so hard, I’ll probably win a stuffed animal.
When asked about the hardships of being a vigilante superhero…
Jason: We live with Damian, so the word “inconvenience” has really lost all meaning.
Red Hood/Arsenal: Therapy…
Roy: Okay, well, for starters, there’s nothing wrong with keeping our toothbrushes in the same holder.
Dinah: Jason, what do you say to that?
Jason: I think we should see other vigilantes.
And the “Big Brother of the Year” Award goes to…
Jason: When Tim’s feeling anxious, I make him take a long walk.
Dick: Does that help?
Jason: For a while. Then he comes back.
Family Patrol Night…
Red Hood and Red Robin: *replaying (for the nth time) a clip of Robin accidentally tripping on his shoelaces, falling off a ledge, and hanging upside-down from a skyscraper*
Red Robin: You can’t put that on Snapchat.
Red Hood: Fine, I’ll put it on Facebook like a caveman.
Tim [to Jason]: Wine? No, thank you. I like my grapes the old fashioned way. In a juice box.
Jay, maybe wait for DC to age him up a bit first?
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