Dick: Bruce thinks he has it bad? As his understudy, I have to wear a Batman cowl on top of my Nightwing mask, and then Spyral hypnos tech on top of that!
He gets confused, too.
Tag: incorrect batfamily quotes
When asked what it’s like being a superhero for over 75 years…
Batman: Once you make a grown man pee his pants, you start to think about where your life is headed.
Visiting your brother at Blackgate Penitentiary to give him a top secret escape code be like…
Tim: *stares at a bearded Jason through the glass partition*
Jason: *stares back*
Tim: *smirks*
Jason: *grins and takes the phone off the hook*
Tim: *follows suit*
Jason: Do you know how long someone who is as sarcastic as I am would last in prison? Suuuuuuch a long time.
Oh, he’ll last alright, but for completely different reasons.
When your fiancés friends weigh in on your wedding plans…
Selina [to Hal]: I am not getting married in space.
Have you sent out your save-the-dates yet? (Or is it still too early with the threat of – well, ANYTHING in the Multiverse possibly ruining your wedding plans looming?) @Bruce Wayne @Selina Kyle
When your fiancés friends weigh in on your wedding plans…
Selina [to Hal]: I am not getting married in space.
Have you sent out your save-the-dates yet? (Or is it still too early with the threat of – well, ANYTHING in the Multiverse possibly ruining your wedding plans looming?) @Bruce Wayne @Selina Kyle
A toast with Timothy Drake-Wayne…
Tim: To happiness!
Tim: Or, as I like to call it, sadness in its early stages.
The bottle of pinot noir? $20.
The ensuing awkward silence? Priceless.
Why you don’t ask your heavily sleep-deprived, just-returned-from-another-dimension-after-jumping-off-a-building son to make a toast at your wedding. @Bruce Wayne @Selina Kyle
When you’re a salty wedding guest…
At Bruce and Selina’s wedding reception…
Usherette: So, are you a friend of the bride or the groom?
Jason: Well, the groom is my father, so… the bride.
So, now that Batman #33 (2017) is out, are we getting a panel or two like this soon?
Standing up for your younger brother be like…
Red Hood: Just a teenager, Bruce? Well, that “teenager” *points at Red Robin* saved my life.
Red Hood: Granted, it was in a video game…
Getting off duty and finding an intruder in your apartment be like…
Dick: *walking into the dark kitchen, taking off his BPD uniform*
Dick: *pauses when he notices the light*
Dick: *carefully grabs an escrima stick from a hidden compartment in the cupboard*
Dick: *prepares to pounce on the intruder behind the open refrigerator door…*
Dick: aaaaAAHHHH… Huh?
Red Hood: *blinks*
Dick: *blinks*
Red Hood: *mouth stuffed with donuts and face covered in sugar sprinkles*
Red Hood: What are you, the donut police? Because if you are, you’re legally bound to tell me, or else it’s entrapment.
Don’t judge your brother, Dick. Beating up criminals can really build up an appetite.
Nightwing: Guys, we don’t have “origin stories”, we have lives.
Nightwing: *looks around at the rest of the Batfamily*
Nightwing: At least… Yup, just me.
Just because you have a healthy social life, it doesn’t mean you get to rub it in people’s faces. Dick.
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