Red Hood [on the Comm Link]: If I plan to do anything else stupid, I’ll let you know. Peace out!
Batman: *groans*
Or a study on the association between the number of gray hairs on Bruce Wayne’s head and the frequency at which he sends his sons on missions.
Talia: I am not just your mother, and you are not a child.
Damian: I never was.
In which Little D could use a Dick Grayson hug right about now.
Red Hood: *stops trying to pick the lock on his handcuffs when he realizes that doing so only causes them to tighten even further*
Red Hood: Huh. Smart.
Red Robin: Dude, don’t compliment the bad guys.
Sending your brother the coordinates to a criminal mastermind’s lair be like…
Red Robin [on the Comm Link]: You got this. You come back.
Red Hood: Promise.
Red Robin: Asswipe.
Red Hood: Jerk.
Batfather’s Day…
Batman: *opens a blood-stained greeting card with a bullet hole in the middle*
Red Hood [on the Comm Link]: Did you see the hearts? It took me, like, six minutes.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
In which Alfred gets teary-eyed from seeing the biggest grin he’s seen on his son’s face in years (and the card he himself got from his grandson).
On the rooftop where they first chased each other…
Bruce: *fidgeting with his cuff links (something old: was his father’s)*
Selina: *smoothening out her lacy, white dress (something new: picked by Harley and Ivy)*
Bruce: *glances at something in the evening sky*
Selina: *knows exactly what her fiancé’s been not-so-discreetly staring at behind her*
Selina: *sighs and grabs his face so that he’s looking her straight in the eye*
Selina: You are not allowed to die. Do you understand?
Red Hood: *wiping blood away from his busted lip* You made one big mistake, you ancient dirtbag.
Ra’s al Ghul: And what was that?
Red Hood: You pissed off your grandson.
Robin: *spits out a broken tooth and cracks his knuckles*
You know that end scene in “Justice League” (2017)?
Bruce: Can I start buying you things now?
Clark: No, you can’t. But, hey, I’ll tell you what. You can buy Lois stuff.
Bruce: I know you’d like a new tractor.
Clark: Lois would love a new tractor.
Uh huh, Clark.
Also, Bruce buying him things? Canon. And by “things”, I mean real estate property and stuff. And by “canon”, I mean canon, folks.
Sparring sessions at Wayne Manor…
Jason: *coming out of the training room and cradling a broken arm* I can’t believe we just got beat up by a girl.
Tim: *following soon after and massaging his sore jaw* Let’s never speak of this again.
Cass: *grinning from ear to ear*
When you see footage of your father, who’s bruised, bloodied, bound and being taunted by a villanous metahuman, on the Batcomputer screen…
Nightwing:
Red Hood:
Red Robin:
Robin:
Alfred: *clears his throat*
Alfred: Boys, he wouldn’t want you involved –
Robin: *pulls his sword from its scabbard and releases Goliath from his cage*
Red Robin: *tracks the source of the footage and hacks into its system*
Red Hood: *reloads his guns and straps on explosives*
Nightwing: *lights up his escrima sticks* We’re already involved. We’re family, Alfred.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
I mean it’s not as if Alfred left that footage to stream for you to “accidentally” find against Batman’s orders… Right?
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