Dick: Look, I’ve been screwed by Darwinism. Never needed to evolve listening skills ‘cause my looks are so highly developed.

Tim: Um, that’s not how evolution works.

Dick: Yeah, sure it is! Look, say I had to catch my own food, right? But I only ate really fast animals? My feet would eventually evolve into rockets.

Damian: Grayson, it’s amazing your brain doesn’t evolve into pudding.

Jason trying to convince his brothers that he’s the bad ass in the family…

Jason: You know how I’m kind of a sexy bad boy who rides motorcycles into work and is always breaking the rules in the name of justice?

Dick: I don’t like where this is going.

Jason: I also maybe sometimes bring home case files to work on them after hours, and I might not be that great about returning them.

Dick: *facepalms*

Tim: *rolls eyes*

Damian: Tt.

After Batman reprimands Red Hood for disobeying a direct order during patrol…

Jason: Rules are made to be broken.

Bruce: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.

Dick: Uh, piñatas?

Tim: Glow sticks.

Damian: Karate boards.

Steph: Spaghetti when you have a small pot!

Jason: Rules.

Damian the Teenager…

Dick: Damian, do you know why little boys belittle girls’ pigtails on playgrounds?

Damian: Because they’re so easy to grab, they’re just begging to be pulled.

Dick: Because they like the girls and that’s the only way they know how to get their attention.

Damian: *frowns* What are you saying?

Dick: All of this teasing. This elaborate date. Somewhere deep down, you like Maya. Like, like her like her.