When asked if he thought he’d get along with his youngest brother…
Jason: Look, Damian and I don’t work. We are oil and water. Or oil and TNT and C4 and a detonator and a butane torch.
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Tim: Damian, you’re going to jail for a very long time.
Dick: He’s not going to go to jail, you know. He’s a minor.
Tim: Well, we’ll let the jury decide.
Dick: There’s not gonna be a jury. It’s a –
Tim: Then the judge will decide where he goes.
Dick: Look, he’s going to do probation. He’s a minor.
Tim: Dick, just let me have this?
Dick: You’ll never guess what I found on Damian’s Facebook!
Tim: A friend? Buuurn.
Brothers that sneak out together get grounded together…
Jason: I had to wait until your dad fell asleep so I could steal the Batmobile keys. You ready?
Damian: I was born ready. I’m Damian freakin’ Wayne.
When asked what she thinks of the Batboys (and who steals her food from the fridge)…
Steph: Tim will always be driven, Dick will always be giving, Bruce will never apologize, Damian’s sort of a wildcard from my perspective, and Jason will forever remain a conniving son of a b***h.
When you’re tailing a police car in order to free your son…
Police Officer [about the Batmobile]: What kind of idiot drives down a public pathway?!
Robin: Hey, that’s my father. HEY, FATHER!
When your dad’s extremely protective of your sister…
Batman [to Nightwing, Red Hood, Red Robin, and Robin, about Black Bat]: Guard her with your life. That’s not hyperbole!
Wayne Charity Foundation galas be like…
Tim: Damian, please pretend you’re a human.
Having an overbearing son be like…
Bruce: I thought I told you to stop reading my e-mails.
Damian: Well, I thought I told you to stop keeping secrets!
Investigating a supervillain’s lair be like…
Maps: Creepy.
Damian: I don’t know… Add some bats and a gigantic coin and this is my Father’s cave.
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