Tag: bruce wayne

The Flash: *covers eyes* Wow. Wowsers.

Wonder Woman: This is not what it looks like.

Superman: Right. We were just…

Batman: No. I do not need the details.

Green Lantern: *shrugs* I wouldn’t mind a few details.

Batman: I don’t understand why people run.

The Flash: Well, it’s therapeutic. It has great cardiovascular benefits. What’s more, it gets the old endorphins pumping. I tell you, running gives me a great high.

Batman: I was referring to the driver running from the scene of the crime, Flash.

Lucius: Are you ever going to get a new Batmobile?

Bruce: Well, firstly, I never buy Batmobiles. (You build them for me.) Secondly, I need something that ignites my passions. It’s like a woman: I need to be in love before I commit.

Lucius: You’ve never committed to a woman.

When you’re so ready for that lunch break after hours of discussing one case, but…

Batman: Hn. It doesn’t make any sense.

Green Lantern: What now, Batsy? Hasn’t your beautiful mind gotten you in enough trouble today?

Anybody: Batman, whatever you might have heard, hope you will form your own opinion of me?

Batman: I always do.

And he does. The rest of the Justice League could vouche for you and he’d still stalk you in the middle of the night and cross-reference every existing record you have.

While watching Damian drive around the Manor grounds, running over statues and leaving flattened shrubbery in his wake…

Dick: Most fathers teach their sons how to drive. I have you to blame for this?

Bruce: This he learned from his mother.

That’s what you get for refusing to let him drive, Bruce.

When you really just want to make up for lost time with your adoptive father…

Red Hood [on the Comm Link]: Bruce, I can’t stop this. I need your help.

Batman: Whatever it takes.

Red Hood: …

Red Hood: Okay, let’s go fishing.