#big brother of the year

So, I have a new tag, and it’s mostly dedicated to incorrect quotes featuring Jason being, well, a big brother to either Tim or Damian.

In my mind, Red Hood does try his best to be a good influence to a younger generation of superheroes, but accepts the fact that he’s no Dick Grayson. He’s more of the learn-from-my-mistakes kind of older brother, and a very, very protective one at that. His methods of mentoring may not always be ideal, but they come from a good place.

That being said, this tag isn’t limited to Jason and may feature other DCU big brothers doing what they do best.

And the “Big Brother of the Year" Award goes to…

Jason: *polishing his knives*

Damian: Todd, can I ask you a question about women?

Jason: I got you that book last year. Wasn’t everything in there?

That’s not what you give 12-year-old boys, Jay.

Trying to (apologetically) explain your little brother’s condescending attitude to his teammates be like…

Red Robin [to the Teen Titans]: Damian doesn’t know when he’s being mean because the part of his brain that should know is getting a wedgie from the rest of his brain.

When you realize that your little brother’s not so little anymore…

Jason: I’d make fun of Damian for having girl problems if I weren’t so shocked that Damian had girl problems.

Dick: Hmmm. It’s going to be difficult to find something you’re both equally good at…

Jason: Is there anything you’re both equally bad at?

Tim and Damian: Human emotions.

Rescuing your brother who’s been stranded in the jungle for five weeks be like…

Nightwing: *hugs Tim* You’re so brave, little brother. I’m proud of you.

Red Robin: *staring blankly* I ate a butterfly. It was so small, so beautiful… I was so hungry.

When Nightwing’s away on a mission and the only adult available for relationship advice is your, um, other older brother…

Jason: *shrugs* I don’t know what to tell you. Buy her something.

Tim: How does that work?

Jason: Well, you skip over any attempt to repair your emotional connection and you win back her affection with an empty financial gesture.

Tim: *tightening his tie and straightening out his double-breasted suit in front of a mirror*

Tim: I’m going to the movies with Tam. I don’t want her to think I think it’s a date.

Jason: Do you think it’s a date?

Tim: *clipping his cuff links and shining his black Oxford shoes* No, but she might think I think it’s a date, even though I don’t.

Jason: Or you might think she thinks you think it’s a date, even though she doesn’t.

Tim: *grooming his hair* Are we overthinking this?

Jason: *handing him a bouquet of roses and a box of chocolates* Not at all.

Signs that your little brother’s not so little anymore…

At Red Hood’s safe house-warming party:

Damian: Todd, can I bring girls here?

Jason: You? Sure. Bring as many as you want.

Damian: Okay.

Jason: Just not against their will.