Tag: jason todd

When you’re the third wheel in your teammates’ “lovers’ quarrel"…

Starfire [about Arsenal]: Argh! He is the, how you say, ass when he drinks the alcohol.

Red Hood: He’s an ass when he doesn’t. You just don’t hear it.

Why it’s hard to stay mad at your rebellious vigilante son after you call him out on his “reckless behavior”…

Red Hood: When you say “mistake”, do you mean a fortunate mistake? Like the discovery of penicillin?

Batman: Hrrrrn.

When you open your safe house door and find your rain-drenched little brother standing there…

Damian: Todd, I believe you know why I’m here.

Jason: *yawns* I always figured it was to study us, discover our weaknesses, and report back to your alien overlords.

At Red Hood’s safe house…

Damian: *pounds on the door*

Jason: *opens the door*

Damian: Todd, your cell phone was off.

Jason: Because I didn’t want to be disturbed.

Damian: Well, that didn’t work out, now did it?

Jason: Roy, I’m gonna really miss you.

Roy: Will you come visit me?

Jason: Seventeen hours is a really long flight… How about we meet halfway?

Roy: Halfway is 600 miles off the coast of Japan, dude.

Jason: We’ll Skype.

When you find out that Bruce’s planning to send your youngest brother to Summer Camp…

Dick: *does meditative yoga poses while hanging upside down from the chandelier*

Jason: *lies down on the couch, tucks his arms behind his head, and kicks off his boots*

Tim: *sighs contentedly, takes a little sip of his coffee, and stares dreamily out the window*

Jason: Just imagine… If the brat says yes, we’ll have an entire summer without him.

Dick: We could play outside.

Jason: We could sit on the left side of the couch.

Tim: I could use the bathroom at 8:20!

Dick: Our dreams are very small, aren’t they?

Upon returning to the Manor after a mission abroad…

Red Hood: *sees Batgirl jump into Nightwing’s arms to hug him*

Red Hood: Dammit, I should have gone over and said we were back.

Red Robin: *rolls eyes* Yeah, it was “first come, first serve”.

Guess who lost the Robins’ Rock, Paper, Scissors battle to not accompany Damian gift shopping?

Damian [to employee]: If I were to give you this gift basket, based on that action alone, and no other data, infer and describe the hypothetical relationship that exists between us.

Employee: Excuse me?

Damian: Here. *hands gift basket to employee* Now, are we friends, colleagues, lovers? Are you my grandmother?

Employee: I don’t understand what you’re talking about, and you’re making me a little uncomfortable.

Jason: *grabs Damian by the scruff of his neck*

Jason: See, sounds just like you and Raven. We’ll take it.

Jason: *takes the gift basket and drags Damian away*