When your best friend has been noticeably more aggressive with criminals during patrol…
Superman: Bruce, I know you’re angry –
Batman: My son is dead. Angry doesn’t begin to cover it.
Tag: jason todd
When Batman grounds your older brother…
Robin: *studying a case on the Batcomputer*
Red Hood: *whistles “Call Me Maybe” while putting his newly cleaned guns away*
Robin: -Tt-
Robin: *resumes working*
Red Hood: *slides across the cave on a chair with wheels, making screeching sounds*
Robin: Hrrrn. *clenching his teeth*
Red Hood: Hey, Little D –
Robin: Todd, if I must babysit you, you become a hindrance and I can’t have that.
And that is why Bruce came home to see Jason gagged and tied to the giant Joker card.
Mission briefing…
Red Robin: Understood?
Nightwing: *double thumbs up*
Robin: *salutes*
Red Hood: *turns off Spotify streaming in his helmet*
Red Hood: Okay, I’m just nodding here and pretending like I have some idea of what you’re talking about.
Mornings at the Manor…
Damian: This is a black kale-chia smoothie.
Jason: Why are you drinking that? Did you lose a bet or something?
Tim: Do you have an infected lesion?
In which Damian takes his breakfast elsewhere.
When asked what his motto in life was…
Red Hood: Batman likes to say “You can be part of the problem or part of the solution”. But I happen to believe that you can be both.
Damian: Todd, let it go. I’m faster than you.
Jason: If only there were some way we could settle this once and for all, but how?
Damian: You seriously want to race me? I won the Gotham City Half-Marathon last year!
Jason: Okay, I’m half-scared.
Damian:
Damian: Okay, we do need to do this. I’ll go change.
It’s a trap, Little D.
When you’re all kind of “co-parenting” your youngest brother…
Dick: Damian needs to know that we believe in him. It’s the most important thing. If you tell children they have wings, they will believe they can fly.
Jason: Oh, really? I had a buddy that went to Gothamfest, believed he could fly, didn’t end great. That’s why hotels’ windows don’t open anymore.
And by “buddy”, he meant a drunken Roy.
Jason: Did you know that fencing goes back to the twelfth century?
Damian: Fencing? Pfft. Do you know what’s even nerdier than fencing? Knowing when it began.
Tim: I don’t think you’re a nerd, Jay –
Jason and Damian: Shut up, dork!
Jason [to Dick]: I’m fairly confident that one of Bruce’s proudest moment was when you finally took off the scaly, green leotard.
Planning a surprise birthday party for your youngest (kiddie-party-deprived) brother be like…
Dick: Um, Jason’s not much of a clown fan…
Duke: Has he ever seen a good one?
Jason: *from three rooms away* HAS ANYONE???
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Duke, sweetie, it’s a, um… *clears throat* sensitive topic.
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