Tag: jason todd

Jason [to the bartender]: Can I get a strawberry daiquiri?

Dick: *spits out his beer* Did you say “strawberry daiquiri”?

Jason: I am comfortable in my manhood, brother.

Dick: Oh, yes, you are. Deep dish pizzas, strawberry daiquiris. You like the finer things in life.

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Batman: *studying a case on the Batcomputer*

Nightwing: *parkour-ing from giant memento to giant memento in the Batcave*

Red Hood: *aiming at the bats with his guns (”What? For target practice!”)*

Red Robin: *rambles on about his Multiverse theories to Bruce while dragging around an IV stand with a pouch of pure liquid caffeine* 

Batgirl: *taking a selfie while Spoiler braids her hair*

Robin: *approaching Alfred with Batcow in tow (”I need more pet food, Pennyworth.”)*

Lark: *Snapchatting everyone while ducking to avoid Dick (”Typical Tuesdays”)*

Batman: *finds it hard to focus, stops typing*

Batman: *looks at the chaos that is his children*

Alfred: *serves Bruce some tea*

Batman: Alfred, this is like a waking nightmare of happiness.

Alfred: *grins and walks away*

Orphan: *hugs Bruce’s neck from behind*

Batman: *grins as his daughter skips away to join the fray*

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Family Patrol Night…

Batman: I will go in and do this quietly.

Red Hood: Well, if that doesn’t work, we will come in to make some noise. *cocks guns*

Nightwing: *lights up escrima sticks*

Red Robin: *twirls bo staff*

Robin: *brandishes sword*

Bonus:

Superman: *hovers and winks*

Bruce, what made you even think that they’d stay behind?

When your partner’s doppleganger from a different Earth has a skill you could use in dealing with a mob boss right about now…

Arsenal: *whispering* You do speak Spanish, right?

Red Hood: *whispering back* Spanish? I barely speak English!

“Bamboozled” is a legitimate word, Mr. Classic Literature Fan. You’re doing fine.

When your adoptive father wants to have a private conversation with a colleague but you’re bored out of your mind and eavesdropping seems fun..

Nightwing [on the Comm Link]: *hanging from one of the ceiling stalactites in the Batcave* His mouth hasn’t moved in three and a half minutes.

Red Hood [on the Comm Link]: *crouching behind the glass case of his Robin uniform* Hal Jordan’s probably got him on hold.

Robin [on the Comm Link]: *sitting inside the dinosaur’s oral cavity* No, no. His nostrils are flaring. He’s pacing like a maniac.

Red Robin [on the Comm Link]: *viewing Batman from his own bedroom via a secret camera he installed on the Batmobile* And he just switched his phone from his right hand to his left hand like he wants to punch someone.

~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~

Perhaps because he knew that you boys have been listening in all along? Y’all ain’t slick.

Batman: *discussing the do’s and don’ts for an upcoming mission*

Red Hood [to The Signal]: *whispering* Don’t worry about it, man.

Red Hood: *gestures to his brothers and to himself* You’re kind of like a Robin now. We make our own rules.

Nightwing: *winks*

Red Robin: *grins*

Robin: *salutes*

~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~

Bros before… broody, mood-killing, adoptive fathers clad in leather.

When you call for back-up but end up battling a bunch of rogues by yourself…

Medic [speaking into the radio]: He’s lost a lot of blood.

Red Hood: I didn’t lose it. I’ve been sitting in it for hours, waiting for one of my brothers to get back from dance class or something. *stands up and drags himself to his motorcycle, leaving a trail of blood behind him*

Jason: *shoves Tim out of his room and shuts the door behind them* You invaded my privacy. I have a right to be upset, okay?

Tim: It’s not snooping if something is out in the open. That’s the rule.

Jason: There’s no rule.

Tim: Are you serious? “If it’s not hidden, it’s not forbidden.” You’ve never heard of that?

Jason: No, I’ve never heard of it because you just made it up.

So he saw the little Bizarro plushie on your bed (or was it the pair of Batman boxers under it?). So what? It’s adorable, Jay!