Mornings at the Batcave…
Tim: *downing a cup of espresso* Okay, we all know why we’re here, right?
Dick: *still in just boxer shorts, yawning and shaking his head*
Jason: *groans* No. Why?
Tim: To fight Damian, the bully. That tiny tween has been tormenting all of us for years, and I for one am sick of it! I can’t promise you victory. I can’t promise you good times. But the one thing I do know –
Dick and Jason: *head back to the Manor*
Tim: Whoa! Whoa! I promise you victory! I promise you good times!
Tag: jason todd
Why you don’t hide Damian’s things…
Damian: *wearing his Robin uniform in the kitchen*
Dick: *chokes on his cereal*
Jason: *pinches his nose to stifle his laughter*
Tim: What the f…
Damian: Perhaps I’m not making myself clear here. This is a threat.
While Nightwing recuperates from a nasty encounter with Red Hood…
Tim [to Dick]: Remind me to beat some sense into our brother once you’re healthy.
Damian [to Tim]: Remind me to remind you to get in line.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
They’re pretty protective of their eldest.
Entering Robin’s room be like…
Jason: *whispering* It’s quiet.
Tim: *hissing* Of course it’s quiet. It’s a trap.
Damian: *a pair of narrowed eyes in the shadows*
Damian [on the Comm Link]: Todd, I broke my last saxophone reed, and I need you to get me a new one.
Red Hood: *reloading his guns while hiding behind barrels as bullets whizz past him* Uh, isn’t this the kind of thing Alfred’s better at?
Damian: I called him. He’s not home. I also tried Father, Grayson, Drake, Brown, Thomas, and the Commissioner, Barbara’s father.
Red Hood: *twisting a criminal’s arm and throwing another across the wall* Wow, and after them, out of all the people in the world, you chose me.
At a “field trip” to S.T.A.R. Labs…
Jason: *poking at the reptilian creature on his head* This feels so weird. What does it eat?
Scientist: Oh, just human brains.
Damian: Well, at least Todd has nothing to worry about.
Batman: Jason, where are you going?
Red Hood: To cross a line.
When Batdad just automatically responds with some random punishment to carry out…
Alfred: Master Bruce, do you even know which one of your sons I’m talking about?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Does it even matter anymore?
When your legally dead brother’s “low-key” bitter that he wasn’t included in the latest Wayne Family painting…
Tim: Did you just paste your picture over our family portrait?
Jason: Yeah, I think it looks better.
Tim: You pasted it over my face.
Jason: Yeah, I think it looks better.
Waiting for your eldest brother at his Blüdhaven aparment be like…
Damian: *pinches nose* Disgusting. What’s that smell?
Jason: It’s either bad meat or good cheese.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Find yourself a Nightwing who can do both.
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