Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *e-mailing the Justice League while discussing Wayne Tech plans with Lucius on the phone*
Dick: *stealthily picking blueberries off the pancakes on the serving tray while dangling upside down from the ceiling*
Alfred: *slapping Dick’s hand away while preparing Tim’s morning espresso shots*
Jason: *holding up a bag of catfood so it’s out of Damian’s reach*
Damian: *on his tippy toes trying to reach it while muttering censor-worthy threats to Jason*
Tim: *eyelids drooping and eyes red, wiping dried-up slobber off his face* How long was I out? Is Napster still a thing?
Who’s gonna tell him?
Tag: incorrect batfamily quotes
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: *chowing down three separate bowls of cereals, talking with his mouth full* Why do people eat anything besides breakfast food?
Damian: *looking on disgustedly as milk and fruit bits splatter onto Dick’s shirt* Because people are idiots, Grayson.
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *munching on strawberry-flavored Poptarts*
Tim: *staring blankly ahead*
Jason: *waves a hand in front of his brother’s face*
Tim:
Jason: *snaps his fingers*
Tim:
Jason: *tips the big mug of coffee over, spilling its contents*
Tim: *slowly turns his head to face Jason*
Jason: You’re being so quiet. Are you upset or are you just rebooting?
Jason: *scoffs* I’m not a crybaby.
Dick: “Toy Story 3”?
Jason: They were holding hands in a furnace, Dick!
Yeah, Dick.
Batman: Jason, would it make you feel better to hear that I approved of your life choices?
Red Hood: Yes, it would.
Batman: Hn. Well, you should work on that.
I honestly feel like Dick Grayson would wear this, without shame or even joking because he thinks he looks good and it makes him feel fancy.
Someone draw this and tag me
What do you think @incorrect-batfamily-quotes ?
In which we can hear his brothers groaning all the way from Gotham and see his adoptive father’s hair become instantly grayer, @foxtrotsambablue. (Because of the horrors they face on a daily basis, few can top the sight of Dick in this.)
Dick will wear anything that makes him feel sexy and confident. ANYTHING.
@foxtrotsambablue @incorrect-batfamily-quotes behold, it is drawn
Alas, Jason’s face is tomato-red from all the face-palming, Tim’s is ivory-white from all the espresso shots he’s been taking like beer, and Damian’s is prematurely aged from all the horror-generated contortion.
Bruce simply left the Manor.
Alfred’s the only one who can stand it, @batfucktheshitpostgenerator.
I honestly feel like Dick Grayson would wear this, without shame or even joking because he thinks he looks good and it makes him feel fancy.
Someone draw this and tag me
What do you think @incorrect-batfamily-quotes ?
In which we can hear his brothers groaning all the way from Gotham and see his adoptive father’s hair become instantly grayer, @foxtrotsambablue. (Because of the horrors they face on a daily basis, few can top the sight of Dick in this.)
When you’re still pissed at your brother for pulling a prank on you during patrol…
Jason: Hey, Timbo, I gotta ask you something –
Tim: *cups an ear* What is that I hear? The ga-ga-ga-ghost of someone who’s dead to me?
Well, for a time, he was dead to everyone.
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *brushes his teeth*
Jason: *pauses*
Jason: *exasperated sigh*
Jason [to Dick]: You’re flirting with your reflection again. Cut it out.
And that is why “NEW BATHROOM – Jason” is a suggestion found in the Wayne Manor Home Improvement suggestion box (set up by Alfred).
When you’re trying to give your youngest son the “birds and bees” talk but your other sons want to stick around to see how it goes…
Bruce [to Damian]: *opens mouth to talk*
Bruce: *hears a camera shutter sound*
Bruce: Hn.
Bruce: *opens mouth to talk again*
Bruce: *notices the reflection of three heads peeking from a crevice in the cave on the Batcomputer screen*
Bruce [to Damian]: Oh, good, everyone’s in here. I was worried we’d have a private conversation for once.
A voice from the crevice: You’re welcome, Bruce!
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 