Batman: *reads article in Gotham Gazette about Nightwing, Red Hood, Red Robin, and Robin, and around 5 million dollars-worth of property damage*
Batman: Hrrrn.
Nightwing, Red Hood, Red Robin, and Robin: …
Batman:
Batman: *sighs*
Batman: *takes out check book*
Batman: I prefer you screw up while not wearing your uniforms.
Tag: incorrect batfamily quotes
Interrogation 101, part 2…
Robin: Well, should I beat the answer out of you?
Criminal: No, thanks. I’ll talk.
Robin: -Tt-
Bat-terrogation.

Imagine: Alfred picking up Red Hood and bringing him to the Manor for the holidays as per Batman’s orders.

Imagine: Dick listening as Bruce gives instructions, then noticing Jason and Damian sneaking into the Batmobile.
Good older brothers don’t tattle.

Imagine: Bruce and Dick watching Tim and Damian spar in the Batcave, then realizing that things are starting to go… overboard.
Dick: *closes the latest issue of Cosmopolitan magazine* You consider me a sexy man, correct?
Barbara: I don’t know how to answer that question.
Nightwing: *fidgeting with his suit, stretching the fabric in, um, certain places*
Red Hood: Just suck in your gut.
Nightwing: What gut?
Red Hood: The little pouch where you keep Alfred’s cookies.
Nightwing:
Red Hood:
Nightwing: *pouts and backflips away*
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Not cool, Li’l Wing. Not cool.
When Batman tries to be a “fun dad”…
Bruce: I just booked us a little fishing trip.
Jason: Why, what did I do?
Bruce, Dick, Tim and Alfred: *run into Jason’s bedroom after hearing a scuffle from downstairs*
Jason: *has Damian pinned to the wall*
Damian: *choking Jason*
Jason: *struggling to talk* Nothing to be alarmed about, people. It’s just a man pointing a bull tranquilizer at his little brother.
Bruce, Dick, Tim and Alfred: *run into Jason’s bedroom after hearing a scuffle from downstairs*
Jason: *has Damian pinned to the wall*
Damian: *choking Jason*
Jason: *struggling to talk* Nothing to be alarmed about, people. It’s just a man pointing a bull tranquilizer at his little brother.