Dick: Enjoying Damian’s cruelty-free vegan seafood buffet?
Wally: It’s pretty good once you get over how allergic I am to soy.
Dick: What?! Oh my gosh! Don’t eat that! *tries to grab the food*
Wally: *pushes back* Hey! I’m a consenting adult!
Tag: dick grayson
Jason: I am the target.
Jason: I am the target.
Tim: Ugh!
*zooms out to Jason zeroing in on a dart board, while everyone else becomes impatient waiting*
Damian: Then go already! Bag with which one douches!
Jason: I’m sorry, what’s that?
Tim: Miss it.
Jason: I can’t hear you –
Jason: *bull’s eye shot*
Dick: Alright!
Jason: – over the sound –
Jason: *bull’s eye shot*
Tim: Come on!
Dick: Really?
Jason: – of my deafening awesomeness!
Jason: *bull’s eye shot*
Everybody else: *groans*
Sorting stacks of old case files at the Batcave…
Dick: You know I think we’re making some real progress.
Tim: Where, in opposite world? We’re never gonna finish all this!
Damian: We could if certain people would help. -Tt-
Jason: *standing behind stacks of cardboard boxes* I’m sorry, are you addressing me? Because your authority is not recognized in Fort Kickass.
Sorting stacks of old case files at the Batcave…
Dick: You know I think we’re making some real progress.
Tim: Where, in opposite world? We’re never gonna finish all this!
Damian: We could if certain people would help. -Tt-
Jason: *standing behind stacks of cardboard boxes* I’m sorry, are you addressing me? Because your authority is not recognized in Fort Kickass.
Dick: When would you use an underwear gun?
Jason: Hopefully never.
Nightwing: *watches as Jason meticulously tucks his shirt into his cargo pants* When would you use an underwear gun?
Red Hood: Hopefully never.
Running away from Bane…
Nightwing: Go, go, go –
Red Hood: *grabs his collar and pulls him back to the ground then runs away*
Nightwing: AHHH! Are you really that selfish?!
Red Hood: Apparently!
Investigating missing Wayne Tech money (that Jason was accused of spending)…
Dick: Yep, see here? Jack from HR just stole 50,000 from Jason’s acount. Must have been doing it all along.
Jason: Apology accepted. Ass douche.
Dick: Hey!
Jason: What?
Damian: *points a katana at Jason* Call him that again.
Jason: Make me!
Tim: What?
Jason: What? Bruce, do you see this? This is a hostile work environment!
About to hijack an enemy plane to return to Gotham City…
Dick: Tim’s unconscious. Who’s gonna fly it?
Jason: Don’t – Why would you worry about that before you need to?
Dick: Wha –
Jason: Why clog your brain with a bunch of hypothetical maybe-what-if bullshit?
Dick: Because –
Jason: Shut up! Because this is what we’re doing.
Dick [to Bruce]: Look, I think maybe Jason’s just been trying too hard.
Damian: *scoffs*
Dick: Serious! I mean, sad as it is, deep down he just wants your approval, and lately you’ve been putting so much pressure on him.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 