dick grayson – Page 149 – incorrect-batfamily-quotes

That one time Superboy cried because Robin wouldn’t accept his birthday present for him…

Kara [about Jon]: Well, Damian, you are his best friend. Friends give each other presents.

Damian: I accept your premise; I reject your conclusion.

Tim [to Kara]: *whispering* Try telling him it’s a non-optional social convention.

Kara: What?

Jason: Just do it.

Kara [to Damian]: It’s a… non-optional social convention.

Damian: Ah. Fair enough. *takes the gift and walks away*

Dick: *grins* He came with a manual.

Playing Hide and Seek at the Manor be like…

Damian: Count me out.

Dick: What? Why?

Damian: You want me to use my skills in a tawdry competition. Would you ask Picasso to play Pictionary? Would you ask Noah Webster to play Boggle? Would you ask Jacques Cousteau to play Go Fish?

Dami, sweetie, you’re 10.

When you and your brothers take the Batmobile out for a spin without permission and it breaks down in the middle of nowhere…

Nightwing: Come on, guys, push!

Red Hood: If I push any harder, I’m gonna give birth to my colon!

Robin: I can’t feel my fingers! Hurry up!

Red Robin: It’s the same amount of work no matter how fast you go! Basic physics!

Red Hood: Timmy, if my fingers ever work again, I’ve got a job for the middle one.

BEWARE The Robin…

Tim [about Damian]: Do you know what he did??? He watched me work for ten minutes and then started to design a simple piece of software that could replace me!

Dick: Is that even possible?

Tim: As it turns out, yes.

Dick: Damian, you need to widen your circle of friends.

Damian: I have a very wide circle. I have 212 friends on Facebook.

Dick: Yes, and you’ve never met one of them.

Damian: That’s the beauty of it.

Trying to get a feel for whether your brother was being serious or sarcastic…

Tim [to Dick, about Jason]: He seemed really sincere, like when he tells me he hates my face.

Feeling that awkward tension in Mount Justice be like…

Dick: You know what else is interesting? Since M’gann has been here, you haven’t mentioned the love of your life once.

Wally: What are you talking about? I’ve talked about spare ribs like ten times – Oh, Artemis!

Dick: *opens his arms widely* Have another hug.

Jason: I don’t want another hug. I’ve had four.

It’s probably more for him than it is for you, so just let him have this, Jay.

Teaching your little brother (who was raised by assassins in a mountain far away) about sports be like…

Dick: *setting up the rims and nets*

Jason: *dribbling the balls*

Tim: *configuring the shot clock*

Damian: *putting on his cleats* I’ve never played basketball. I’m certain I’ll pick it up. Who’s going to be goalie?

Batfamily Workshops be like…

Nightwing: Rule #364 with a baby, don’t use it as a human shield.

The rest of the Batfamily: *nod solemnly*