Batman [to Robin]: Sorry, I replaced you with a newer model.
Bruce, *gasp*!
Tag: dick grayson
When your little brother scoots over from his favorite spot on the couch to accomodate you…
Dick: How about that? Damian’s being reasonable.
Tim: Yeah, it’s freaking me out. I’m gonna go.
Working together to get your brother to be “more involved with the family” be like…
Dick: Wow. How’d you get Jason to come to the Manor?
Tim: As Professor Proton says, “There’s no problem you can’t solve if you use your noggin”.
Damian: And, Drake wrote him a check.
Tim: Yeah, that too. A big check.
“Reaching out” to your youngest son be like…
Bruce: I’m sorry you’re upset, son. You know, sometimes people seek the comfort of physical contact in moments like this –
Damian: Father, I am not flying back to Gotham City just so Grayson can give me a hug.
There, there, Bruce.
Mornings at the Manor…
Damian: *cutting down animal-shaped shrubs on the lawn with a katana*
Dick: *watches Damian through the kitchen window while eating his cereal*
Dick: *grins* His quirks just make you love him more.
Alfred: *blinks*
Alfred: *continues cooking omelettes*
Jason: *aggressively stuffs his mouth with pancakes*
Tim: *chokes on his coffee*
Bruce: *hides behind the Gotham Gazette*
Dick:
Dick: Someone please agree with me.
Preparing for an undercover mission at a Wayne Foundation charity gala for children be like…
Dick: We can’t all be Cinderella.
Tim: Then how do we decide?
Jason: Well, it’s simple. This was my idea. I’m driving. I’m Cinderella. If you bitches got a problem with that, we can stop the car right now.
Damian: *sulking in his Winnie the Pooh costume* -Tt-
Damian: All I needed was the Batplane, so why is it full of you idiots?
Tim: I wasn’t gonna sit around the Batcave all by myself.
Dick: One of us needed multi-engine time for his pilot’s license.
Jason: And one of us would go pretty much anywhere to piss off your father.
The Batboys, getting off a plane, hands up in surrender, at gunpoint by the Air Force…
Dick: Don’t shoot!
Jason: We’re coming out, don’t shoot!
Air Force: *shouting at them to drop their weapons*
Tim: *cursing under his breath*
Jason: Do not shoot! Guys, it’s okay, I – Q clearance! I’ve got Q clearance!
Damian: Seriously, is that even a real thing?
Colonel: Q clearance? Let’s see about that. What’s your authentication phrase?
Jason: Sweet, dash, 44, tender, dash, 9, hot, dash, juicy. Porkchops.
Tim and Damian: *glaring*
Jason: *shrugs* I didn’t pick it.
Damian: Grayson, you hid my knives like I’m a child! And Todd got me those for my birthday, so if you don’t give them back, I’m telling!
First of all, you are a child, Damian. And secondly, really, Jason?
Taking refuge at your brother’s Blüdhaven apartment be like…
Jason: *pulling on the sleepwear he borrowed earlier*
Jason: How do you sleep in these things, Dick? Silk pajamas on satin sheets. I slid out of the bed, like, three times.
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