Visiting your eldest brother in Blüdhaven be like…
Red Hood: Officer, can I read you your rights?
Officer Grayson: …
Red Robin: *wraps his arms around Dick from behind, effectively restraining him*
Robin: *jumps into Dick’s arms, entrapping the man further*
Red Hood: *grins* You have the right to remain hugged. And you have the right to remain missed.
Damian: Brothers don’t call brothers “pathetic”, Todd.
Jason: But what do brothers do when another brother is taking a shower with a cat?
So he loves his pets a little too much, Jay. Leave him alone.
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: *scouring cabinets for the last box of Lucky Charms*
Jason: *sipping tea*
Tim: *working on his laptop, half a waffle hanging from his mouth*
Damian: *enters the kitchen looking solemn*
Damian: Drake. I need you to teach me how to be… a douchebag.
Dick and Jason:
Tim:
Tim: Let’s get started.
Tim and Damian: *walk out of the kitchen*
Jason: What is happening in the world?
Rolling (rapping + trolling)…
Jason: *beatboxing*
Damian: Ain’t no party like a Tim Drake party ‘cause a Tim Drake party don’t start. *drops mic*
Batman: The Twilight Years…
Bruce: *on his deathbed* Dick. What a surprise.
Dick: Really? Were you expecting somebody else? Maybe, uh, one of your other sons?
Bruce: Oh, Jason, Tim, and Damian never visit.
When you’re bored out of your mind at Kent Farm because your fathers are busy hanging out and won’t let you go on patrol without adult supervision…
Bruce and Clark: *chatting and drinking coffee*
Jon: *lies down on the grass* What are you doing?
Damian: *yawns* I’m just trying to throw batarangs at my father’s head, but the wind keeps taking it.
Bruce [to the Press]: I can assure you that my family is back on track and no longer in any trouble.
Lucius: *whispering* Not according to today’s paper.
Bruce: *tightens his grip on the podium* Hrrn. What have we done this time?
I mean, did Nightwing, Red Hood, Red Robin, and Robin have anything to do with five million-worth of property damage last night fighting off criminals in Gotham City? Nah.
That one time – one time – Bruce and Talia tried to co-parent Damian…
Bruce: Well, I think stress is what leads to trouble. You know, the kind you put on Damian, even when he gets an A?
Talia: Minus. And an A gets him an extra hour of sleep. He knows that.
Damian [about Dick and Shawn]: Todd, I’m very pleased that you’re here. I want you to help me break up our brother and his girlfriend.
Jason: Well, I’m all for that. We’ve just got to find him first.
Damian: He’s tied up in the attic.
Dami, no.
Jason: Tim, the accident only happened because I was trying to scare you. Maybe even hurt you.
Tim: That doesn’t sound like you. It sounds like Damian.
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