Making home videos with your family be like…
Jason: *setting up his camcorder*
Jason: Dick, I have to make some adjustments to my film. You’ll play my father.
Dick: I don’t want to be your father!
Jason: Perfect! You already know the lines.
And somewhere in the Manor, Bruce accidentally chokes on his coffee.
“And I don’t need your adult angst.”
Making home videos with your family be like…
Jason: *setting up his camcorder*
Jason: Dick, I have to make some adjustments to my film. You’ll play my father.
Dick: I don’t want to be your father!
Jason: Perfect! You already know the lines.
And somewhere in the Manor, Bruce accidentally chokes on his coffee.
When you disobey a direct order from Batman…
Batman:
*stands up slowly from his chair and glares at Simon*
Hrrrn. Are you trying to get formidable on me, Lantern?
Green Lantern: I-It worked on H-Hal –
Batman: Infomercials work on Jordan.
When your faux
fiancée won’t believe how nosy your siblings can be…
Tim [to Tam]: As soon as we touch, the blinds will open, and three annoying, but lovable, misfits will be staring at us.
And one creepy, but loveable, Batdad will be spying through binoculars from three roofs away.
When your faux fiancée won’t believe how nosy your siblings can be…
Tim [to Tam]: As soon as we touch, the blinds will open, and three annoying, but lovable, misfits will be staring at us.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~
And one creepy, but loveable, Batdad will be spying through binoculars from three rooftops away.
At the Annual Justice League Prom Night…
Bruce: I want to be security.
Clark: Let’s do it together! We can be partners.
Hal: Now, that’s a buddy cop movie I would watch. Which one of you would be the by-the-books cop and which of you would be the bad ass?
Bruce: Don’t be silly, Jordan. I’d be the bad ass.
The Flash: *staring at Batman* How old is he again?
Green Lantern: *shrugs* Fifty-something, I guess. He has a landline and uses the world “album”.
Wrong. He’s over 75 years old.
When your adoptive father keeps secrets from you…
Nightwing: Well, I don’t like being excluded, Bruce! Do you, Timmy? Little D? Jay?
Red Hood: Yes!
He’d really rather stay out of it.
Discussing your friend’s love life be like…
Harley [to Ivy]: Selina’s attracted to men in pain. It helps her pretend to be mentally healthy.
Alfred: Batman wants to see you at the cave, Master Jason.
Robin: And I want pants. A lot of people want a lot of things.
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