Superman [to Batman]: Bruce, you are the bravest, most selfless man I have ever met. And as much as I hate seeing you here in pain and suffering, I also know this is who you genuinely are.
Tag: bruce wayne
Alfred: The more kids the merrier.
Bruce: Be careful what you say, Alfred. You might give me ideas.
And the rest, as they say, is history.
Batman: *badly bruised, pinned to the ground, and trying to push Solomon Grundy off himself*
Batman: Superman.
Superman: *floating in air*
Batman: What are you doing here?
Superman: *grabs the zombie by the collar, lifts him up until he’s five feet off the ground and glares at him with glowing red eyes*
Superman: Isn’t it obvious? I’m your posse.
True love.
Nightwing: I’m going to hug you.
Batman: Thank you for the warning.
When Batman grounds your older brother…
Robin: *studying a case on the Batcomputer*
Red Hood: *whistles “Call Me Maybe” while putting his newly cleaned guns away*
Robin: -Tt-
Robin: *resumes working*
Red Hood: *slides across the cave on a chair with wheels, making screeching sounds*
Robin: Hrrrn. *clenching his teeth*
Red Hood: Hey, Little D –
Robin: Todd, if I must babysit you, you become a hindrance and I can’t have that.
And that is why Bruce came home to see Jason gagged and tied to the giant Joker card.
When Damian approaches post-pubescence…
Bruce: I’m just trying to prepare him.
Dick: For what, therapy?
Maybe let your eldest son handle “the birds and the bees” talk, Bruce?
The Justice League versus…
Braniac: I would prefer to only speak with Batman. Communicating with someone of lesser intellect is difficult for me.
Alfred: *staring at the grandfather clock concealing the entrance to the Batcave*
Alfred: 10:47. Why would you want to be reminded of the moment when everything ended, Master Bruce?
Bruce: Because it didn’t.
Dick: Look, I had my moments of being out of control growing up as Robin. There, you know, I said it! I just don’t want my brothers to make the same bad mistakes that I made. If Damian never wakes up half-naked on a rooftop in Metropolis, I’ve done my job.
Bruce: Our job.
Dick: Right. I’ve done our job.
When you’re secretly feeling insecure because your kids seem to prefer being with their Kryptonian uncle over you…
Batman: *all up in Superman’s space* Because I’m a cool dad, Clark.
Batman: That’s my thang. I’m hip, I surf the web, I text. LOL: laugh out loud. OMG: oh my Grodd. WTF: why the face.
In which Bruce forgot that his Comm Link was still on, earning him a collective groan from said kids.
I’d expect this from Bruce out of the suit not in the suit
He’s that petty at this point. Superman might’ve made an innocent comment during patrol and it rubs Bats the wrong way.
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