Tag: big brother of the year

When Jason finds a way into the Fifth Dimension,uncertain of what – or who – exactly he’s facing, knowing only that Tim’s in there somewhere and that he’s not leaving without his younger brother… 

Red Hood [to an astral projection of Mister Mxyzptlk]: I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you’re looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money…

Red Hood: But what I do have is a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for creatures like you. 

Red Hood: If you let my brother go now, that will be the end of it. I will not look for you. I will not pursue you. 

Red Hood: But if you don’t, I will look for you.

Red Hood: I will find you.

Red Hood: And I will kill you.

~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~

Astral projection of Batman from out of nowhere: Jason, we do not kill. 

When Batman (inexplicably) asks Hellblazer to watch over his sons while he’s away on a mission…

Nightwing: *comes in through the front door of the Manor*

Hellblazer: Ah, the Golden Boy has returned. Release the doves!  

Nightwing: Hi, Mr. Constantine.  

Red Hood: *breaks a window in the foyer and climbs in*

Hellblazer: And you must be the second Robin. I have been thoroughly briefed on you and if you do one thing wrong, I’m going to go medieval on your arse.

When you’re trying to turn over a new leaf but your brothers miss the “chaotic-but-fun” you…

Jason: What is that?  

Tim: *wiggles his eyebrows* Looks like a fuse.  

Jason: All right, what exactly are you planning? 

Dick: We’re planning to get you back. We want our brother back, the way he used to be.  

Damian: Todd, we are well aware of how much you used to like fire, explosions… 

Damian: *hands Jason a lighter*

Jason: *stares at it* 

Jason: Nice try. That was a long time ago.

Tim: Really? 

Jason:

Jason: *looks at the fuse again*

Jason: So, where does this go? 

Dick: Well, I suppose you could find out by crawling over the fence and following the fuse. Or you could find out… *grinning* the Jason way. 

Tim: We’re sure that you’ll make the right decision. 

Jason: Guys, I’m telling you. Things are different now! I’m an adult, I have responsibilities. I’m just not a sixteen-year-old maniac anymore who –

Jason: *hears a click, then sees that his hand has already flicked the lighter on and is holding it to the fuse*

Jason: Huh. Interesting.

When you wake up strapped to the back of your brother’s motorcycle after being infected by Scarecrow’s fear toxin…

Red Robin: Just curious. What happened between your safe house and right now?

Red Robin: Well, you were hysterical, Tim, so I thought the best thing to do would be to inject you with a tranquilizer, drive you to a private air field, put you on a stolen plane, fly you overnight to Gateway City, and then… that brings us to now.

When your heavily sleep-deprived, case-obssessed brother hasn’t even changed his clothes in three days…

Jason: *loudly slurping a milkshake*

Tim: *pauses from typing on the Batcomputer*

Jason: *burps loudly*

Tim: *grits teeth* You know what I don’t have time for?

Jason: *wipes his mouth sloppily with the back of his hand* Shopping for clothes?

Bruce: Tim, please keep an eye on Jason today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get himself arrested.

Tim: Sure. I’d love to see Jason get arrested.

Bruce: Try again.

Tim: I will stop Jason from getting arrested.

Bruce: Correct.

When you’ve gotta go rescue your eldest brother…

Red Hood: Well, I guess that settles that! I mean, it’s not like we can just waltz into enemy territory and… Well, I certainly can’t.

Robin: Can’t? Or won’t?

Red Hood: Both, either, all! They’d shoot me on sight, Little D.

Red Hood: And if you want Big D so damn bad, you can go get him your–

* sound of Batmobile tires screeching *

Red Hood: Huh. I didn’t think he’d actually do it.

—

Really, Jay? You thought Dami was beyond doing something like that?