Batman: *tiredly rubbing his eyes*
Nightwing and the rest of the Team: …
Batman: Do you want to see the bill on your tactical mission? It’s longer than my copy of “Atlas Shrugged”.
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Tam: Tim, I fell for you after you fixed my phone and before I found out you could defuse bombs with computer viruses.
When your super-powered colleagues beg you to teach them your “edgy” ways…
Green Lantern: How’s that field training with Barry going?
Batman: Let me put it this way, Jordan: he makes you look like a natural-born vigilante.
On the way to Red Robin’s new safe house…
Steph: I can’t wait to see the inside of Tim’s safe house! I’m gonna learn everything there is to know about him.
Harper: I bet it’s really fancy. Like Wayne-Manor-fancy.
Jason: No. It’s probably just an empty, white cube with a USB port in it for him to plug his finger in when he’s on Sleep Mode.
Wally: *scoffs* Don’t listen to Dick. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. The guy eats cereal with a fork.
Gotham City, 10 PM…
Robin: *sitting on a gargoyle atop the Wayne Enterprises tower, scrolling through the incorrect-batfamily-quotes Tumblr page on his phone*
Robin: -Tt-
Robin: *scoffs* What childish nonsense! I do not talk like that. Drake, on the other hand –
Robin:
Robin: What the…
Robin: Haaaaa – *breaks out in maniacal laughter*
Nightwing: *somersaults from a dark corner, escrima sticks lighted* Stand down, Robin!
Red Hood: *runs out of the stairwell and onto the rooftop, guns cocked* No need to go crazy there, kid!
Red Robin: *lands onto the rooftop and folds his “wings” behind him, bo staff at the ready* Wait till Batman hears of –
Robin: *wheezing*
Nightwing: Where’s… ? *looking around, utterly confused*
Robin: *wiping gleeful tears from his eyes* Where’s what, Grayson?
Red Robin: Don’t act dumb! The villain you were harrassing! Where are they, brat?!
Robin: …
Red Hood: Look, D, I may be the black sheep of the family and probably not the best example, but the use of excessive force –
Robin: *drags his hand down his face in annoyance* Shut. Up.
Robin: *shows them his phone*
His brothers: *dumbfounded*
Robin: Ridiculous, right? Ha ha ha.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~
Little D may find it hilarious, but I’m… Wow.
It’s quite surreal, especially since I’ve been standing on the shoulders of both professional and amateur writers whose content have inspired me to come up with context for their work (and eventually my own).
Thank you for supporting this blog. Thank you for inspiring me and laughing with me.
Hugs,
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Commissioner Gordon: *watches as Batman grapplehooks out of view*
Commissioner Gordon: *blows out some smoke, flicks his dying cigarette away and crushes it with his shoe*
Commissioner Gordon: *clears his throat and yells into the night sky* You just hate saying goodbye like a normal person, don’t you?
Superman: *clears his throat awkwardly* Because I value our relationship, Bruce, I need to be frank with you: We are in a fight.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
We know where Jon gets it from.
Nightwing: I need your help on a super top secret mission.
Beast Boy: Do I get to parachute out of a plane as a wild horse?
Nightwing: No, you do not, because nobody ever does, but you do get to wear an ear piece.
Beast Boy: Sold!
When your best friend decides to move out of the safe house you’ve been sharing…
Roy: Where ya gonna go?
Jason: I don’t know. I gotta finish packing up and then I’m gonna head out that door, dude, and I’m just gonna open myself up to the universe.
Roy: So, moving back to Batman’s?
Jason:
Jason: Yeah. Yeah, pretty much straight over.
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