chocoh0lic0201

Tim: We need to talk.

Steph: Are you breaking up with me?

Tim: Oh, good. Guess we don’t need to talk.

He’s, um, a very busy dude.

Damian: You’re just as selfish as I am, Drake! You’re just not as good at it yet.

Tim: You’re right. I could never be as good as you. Probably because I actually care.

Damian: Profound, but technically meaningless.

Dami does, too. He just won’t admit it to himself. *shrugs*

Damian: What’s wrong, Grayson?

Dick: There’s this weird pain right above my eyebrow.

Damian: It’s called a stress headache. I got my first one when I was four.

Because Damian is a grumpy man trapped in a child’s body.

At a Batfamily mission briefing…

Red Hood: *raises a hand*

Batman: Do you have a question, Jason?

Red Hood: Yeah, I have a lot of questions.

Red Hood: Number one: How dare you?

At the Titans Tower…

Nightwing: *sees his name heat-engraved onto a wall*

Nightwing: *sighs wearily*

Nightwing: Uh. What’s this over the “i”?

Supergirl: *eyes glowing red and smoky* It’s a heart.

Because it’s canon that Kara had a bit of a crush on Dick.

When you hear squeaky rat noises in the Batcave…

Jason: Extraordinary events call for extraordinary actions. We form an allegiance –

Tim: Sure.

Jason: – to use sudden violence.

Tim: Okay.

Jason: Do you have the tools to turn your bo staff into a stake?

A little overkill, don’t you think, boys? Also, Damian won’t be too happy about this.

Red Robin: *typing away on the Batcomputer, sipping coffee from a pitcher through a straw*

Red Hood: Hey, Timbo?

Red Robin: What?

Red Hood: You wanna pull a prank on Dames?

Red Robin: Not right now, but ask me again ten years ago.

Waiting for Red Robin’s return be like…

Robin: I miss Drake.

Robin: -Tt-

Robin: Congratulations, Universe. You win.

Going through the Justice League membership forms be like…

Black Canary [about Batman]: And where it asks you to state your business he wrote, “Beeswax, Not Yours, Inc.”.

When a new prototype from the Wayne Enterprises R&D Division arrives at the Manor…

Tim: *in the Batcave* Damian, could you come in here please?

Damian: *walks into the Batcave* -Tt-

Android: Hi, Damian Wayne.

Damian: -Tt-

Android: I am Harvey, an android. Damian Wayne stinks.

Tim: Oh, wow, that’s so rude! I’m sorry, I can’t control him.

Damian: -Tt- Yes, you can.