When it’s your last night at the Manor before you go back to your own safe house and your little brother’s being a creep…
Jason:
Jason: *eyelids fluttering*
Jason: *eyes wide open*
Damian:
Jason:
Damian: I’m listening to you snore. I’m wondering how I’ll ever sleep without it.
Jason: If it helps you sleep, then why are you perched on my bedpost staring at me like a tiny boogeyman?
Damian: Really, Todd? Insults? After I spent two hours in your closet waiting for you to fall asleep?
Family Patrol Night…
After 46 hours of spying on Black Mask’s men (and not seeing anything incriminating)…
Red Robin: *dozing off and almost dropping his binoculars*
Robin: *trying to keep his eyes open* -Tt-
Nightwing: *yawns and whips out his mobile phone*
Red Hood: You know, there were plenty of ways to pass the time before smartphones were invented.
Nightwing: That’s true.
Red Hood: *whips out his mobile phone* I’ll look them up – Oh, son of a Bat!
Dick and Jason: *watching as Tim downs his fourth cup of coffee, spilling some on his ketchup and mustard-stained shirt, burps loudly, and wipes dried slobber off his face*
Dick: *sighs*
Jason: I love him, but if he’s broken, let’s ask Bruce not to get a new one.
Steph: We are just people. *gestures to Babs, Cass, and herself* We talk about the same things you guys talk about.
Dick, Jason, Tim: *blink*
Tim: You talk about if werewolves can swim?
Okay, maybe not specifically what you talk about, but…
When your youngest brother wants to show you his appreciation…
Dick: You’re giving us… stickers?
Damian: Not just any sticker. Those are stickers of a kitty saying, “Me-wow!”.
Tim: We’re not preschoolers.
Damian: Fine, I’ll take them all back.
Jason: I earned this! Back off!
Damian: Drake’s upset with me, and I’m not clear as to why.
Jason: Okay, were you talking before you he got upset?
Damian: Yes.
Jason: That’s probably it.
Superboy: Damian, I can’t believe you got me a birthday gift!
Robin: I don’t know why you’re so surprised. I watch movies. I see what people do.
Robin: *yelling from two rooftops away* I know where you live!
Red Robin: *yelling back* And I live where you live!
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
This is not how you threaten each other, boys, but carry on…
When your eldest brother drops by after work…
BPD Officer Grayson: Hey, mister, can I read you your rights? You have the right to remain hugged.
Damian: *trying to wriggle free* -Tt-
Interventions at the Manor…
Alfred: *wearing a mask and carrying a vacuum cleaner*
Dick: *putting on gloves*
Jason: *filling a black garbage bag with piles of… What are these, Timbo?*
Damian: *pinching his nose and looking around in pure disgust*
Tim: I want to get rid of my stuff, but all my stuff is really good and I just can’t get rid of it.
Dick: It’s not and you have to.
Jason: Everything you own is trash.
Damian: You’re basically a hoarder, Drake.
Tim: *chugs a mug of coffee and stains his three-day-old shirt further*
Tim: Not true. Everything has meaning. Everything is connected to something else.
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