Why you don’t hide Damian’s things…
Damian: *wearing his Robin uniform in the kitchen*
Dick: *chokes on his cereal*
Jason: *pinches his nose to stifle his laughter*
Tim: What the f…
Damian: Perhaps I’m not making myself clear here. This is a threat.
Tag: tim drake
While Nightwing recuperates from a nasty encounter with Red Hood…
Tim [to Dick]: Remind me to beat some sense into our brother once you’re healthy.
Damian [to Tim]: Remind me to remind you to get in line.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
They’re pretty protective of their eldest.
Entering Robin’s room be like…
Jason: *whispering* It’s quiet.
Tim: *hissing* Of course it’s quiet. It’s a trap.
Damian: *a pair of narrowed eyes in the shadows*
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: *staring at his cereal bowl*
Dick: Timmy! There’s a message in my Alphabits! It says, “Oooooo”!
Tim: Dick, those are Cheerios.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Go back to sleep, Dick. You clearly need more of it.
I feel like it should be the other way around for some reason
All the Batkids are capable of sleep deprivation. It’s kind of their superpower.
Timothy Jackson Drake, a saga…
Batman: Robin. Are you sleeping while on patrol?
Robin: Uh, uh… No! There’s, uh… a… bug in my eye and I’m trying to suffocate it.
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: *staring at his cereal bowl*
Dick: Timmy! There’s a message in my Alphabits! It says, “Oooooo”!
Tim: Dick, those are Cheerios.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Go back to sleep, Dick. You clearly need more of it.
When Batdad just automatically responds with some random punishment to carry out…
Alfred: Master Bruce, do you even know which one of your sons I’m talking about?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Does it even matter anymore?
When your legally dead brother’s “low-key” bitter that he wasn’t included in the latest Wayne Family painting…
Tim: Did you just paste your picture over our family portrait?
Jason: Yeah, I think it looks better.
Tim: You pasted it over my face.
Jason: Yeah, I think it looks better.
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *picks up the Gotham Gazette*
Dick: *doing pull-ups using the kitchen chandelier*
Alfred: *tugs at Dick’s feet to get him off the chandelier*
Tim: *typing furiously on his laptop, eyes narrowed with concentration*
Jason: *pours a fifth shot of espresso into Tim’s mug*
Damian: *picks bacon off Jason’s plate and feeds it to Alfred the Cat*
Bruce: *puts down the newspaper, buries his face in a hand and shakes his head*
Bruce: Just one question, boys. Do you get pleasure out of humiliating your family?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
I’d say stick to the Business Section, Bruce, but I guess it’s kind of hard to avoid the headlines, huh?
At the Wayne Manor attic…
Dick: *dramatically walks out from behind a dusty, old cabinet wearing his 80’s Nightwing suit*
Jason: *clears his throat loudly*
Tim: *standing absolutely still but with shoulders shaking*
Damian: *jaw drop*
Duke: *eyes wide, covering his mouth*
Dick: You guys think I’m some sort of a joke!
Jason, Tim, Damian, and Duke: *break into a fit of laughter*
Jason: *wiping tears off his eyes* This isn’t disproving that theory.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 