Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *scurrying around the kitchen, opening and closing cupboards, looking under kitchen counters and chairs*
Tim: *typing on his laptop, drinking pure liquid caffeine*
Jason: I have to tell you something. When we fell on really hard times, Roy and I stayed at a rat-infested motel for a month, and I developed a deep-seated fear of rats.
Tim: *not looking away from laptop* I am so sorry to hear about that. I understand your fears and I validate them.
Jason: I’m not looking for your understanding, Tim! Just grab the freakin’ rat!
Tag: tim drake
Mornings at the Manor…
3:30 AM…
Jason: *yawns*
Jason: *turns on kitchen light*
Jason: *heads to the refrigerator to get some milk*
Jason: You’re up early.
Tim: *hanging upside down from the ceiling*
Tim: *staring blankly ahead*
Tim: That would be assuming that I went to sleep.
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *e-mailing the Justice League while discussing Wayne Tech plans with Lucius on the phone*
Dick: *stealthily picking blueberries off the pancakes on the serving tray while dangling upside down from the ceiling*
Alfred: *slapping Dick’s hand away while preparing Tim’s morning espresso shots*
Jason: *holding up a bag of catfood so it’s out of Damian’s reach*
Damian: *on his tippy toes trying to reach it while muttering censor-worthy threats to Jason*
Tim: *eyelids drooping and eyes red, wiping dried-up slobber off his face* How long was I out? Is Napster still a thing?
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Who’s gonna tell him?
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim: *screams from the kitchen* OH, NO!!!
Dick: *bursts out of his room* Oh, no, what???
Tim: *with crumbs all over his face* I did it again. I was sleep-eating. That explains that dream.
If the Batboys had entrance music when they entered a battlefield…
DICK’s would be “Death of a Bachelor” by Panic! At the Disco…
JASON’s, “Heathens” by twenty one pilots…
TIM’s, “Basketcase” by Green Day…
And, DAMIAN’s, “The Imperial March” by John Williams.
We all have that one brother…
Nightwing: *redialling Red Hood’s number for the sixteenth time in a row* Why isn’t he picking up?
Red Robin: Because he’s a jerk. Not breaking news.
We all have that one brother…
Nightwing: *redialling Red Hood’s number for the sixteenth time in a row* Why isn’t he picking up?
Red Robin: Because he’s a jerk. Not breaking news.
Batman: *walks in on his children speaking in hushed tones and huddled by the Batcomputer, with Tim at the helm*
Red Hood: Dudes, what makes you think the old man’s not gonna know that we used his tech to do this?
Nightwing: If he does find out, I’ll handle it, okay? Aren’t you guys even the least bit curious of how many by now?
The Signal: Well, okay, I guess I am now. Let’s do this.
Robin: Father is going to be disappointed at this idiocy.
Red Robin: Pssh. Like that’s stopping you. Besides, this is the only computer on this Earth that can log on to Tumb–
Red Robin: I just got goosebumps. Guys, why did I just get goosebumps? And why isn’t anyone talking to me? Guys?
Red Robin: *slowly turns his seat*
Batman: *with narrowed eyes* Hrrrn.
Nigthwing: *smiling sheepishly* Heyyyy Bruuuuce…
Red Hood: *covering his mouth to stifle his giggling*
The Signal: We – we were just – uhhh –
Robin: I warned them, Father!
Red Robin: Why, you little – *lunges at Damian*
Nightwing: *jumps in to break Tim and Damian apart*
The Signal: *runs to the kitchen to get Alfred*
Red Hood: *takes out his phone and starts recording everything*
Batman:
Batman: *walks past his sons’ wrestling match to the Batcomputer*
Batman: *enters the password to the Tumblr account and looks at the number of followers*
Batman: Hn.
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Your overwhelming support for this blog has gotten them excited, too.
With much appreciation,
a-wayne-at-heart/incorrect-batfamily-quotes
Jason: Did I tell you I got pepper-sprayed today?
Tim: You say that like it’s a good thing.
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And that was just for entering Damian’s room.
Dick: Timmy, what would you do if you were attacked by an invisible, malevolent force?
Tim: *shrugs* I’d tell Jason to lay off the bean burritos at lunch.
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