Batman: Stay with Tim.
Robin: -Tt-
Robin: One doesn’t stay “with” Drake. One stays “despite” him.
Red Robin: Look, Brat, I’m not thrilled either, but one day we might need each other for a transplant so we better keep the lines of communication going.
When Batman’s sons come over to your city and you hear about it at work…
Lois: Hey, Smallville. There are a few developments. You might want to make some room on the front page.
Clark: *raises an eyebrow*
No need to worry, Superman. It’s just your nephews wreaking havoc on some Gotham City criminals who thought they could hide out in Metropolis.
Tim: Alfred, may I go?
Alfred: Is your room clean?
Tim: Um… No.
Alfred: Good. That will give me something to do while you’re with the Teen Titans.
What would these kids do without their grandad?
Robin: *sneaking out of the Manor at midnight*
Jason: *turns a lamp on*
Jason: *sitting in the dark with his legs crossed and a novel on his lap* Where are you going, Brat?
Robin: -Tt-
Robin: I don’t know.
Jason: When will you be home?
Robin: I’m not sure.
Jason: Where are you going?
Robin: You already asked me that, Todd!
Jason: Will you bring me back something?
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
This is why you’re secretly Dami’s favorite older brother sometimes, Jay.
Batman’s twilight years be like…
Tim: Bruce, you shouldn’t wear glasses that weren’t prescribed for you.
Bruce: Hn. Dick, just because you’re ten feet tall, it doesn’t mean that you can tell me what to do.
Jason: I’m Jason.
Tim: Gimme those!
DC: Robin! I need to use you in a story arc.
Robin: You want me to be in the series?
DC: It’s just a few panels. Your predecessor’s supposed to be in ‘em, but he’s dead.
Robin: Dead?!
DC: Or pretending to be. I don’t know. I forget.
Commissioner Gordon: Who died and made you Batman?
Nightwing/Red Hood/Red Robin/Robin/Azrael: Uhhhh…
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
So, who’s gonna tell him?
Jason: Wow. Little Timmy, the new CEO of Wayne Enterprises. I feel so full of… What’s the opposite of shame?
Dick: Pride?
Jason: No, not that far from shame.
Dick: Less shame?
Jason: *beaming with pride* Yeah.
When your brother tells you to butt out of his fights…
Jason: It’s not my problem, Tim? I’m the one who had to go between you and Damian’s sword.
Bruce: Tim, I really don’t like you telling personal secrets to the Teen Titans.
Tim: Bruce, I didn’t tell ‘em personal stuff.
Bruce: Today at the Justice League meeting everyone knew that I dyed my white hairs black.
Tim: Oh, you mean about you?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
It’s just that even in the rare moments that he’s asleep, your son’s mind is going a mile a minute and his mouth goes along with it, Batman.
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