Jason: You told on me?
Dick: You wouldn’t listen to reason, so now you have to listen to Bruce.
Tag: source: two and a half men
During Damian’s first days at the Manor…
Dick: *watching Damian spar with electronically generated villains in the Batcave*
Dick: He’s really something.
Tim: Oh, yeah. He’s really something. The question is what.
Timothy Drake is not impressed.
Roy: What time?
Jason: Eight.
Roy: O’clock?
Jason: *rolls eyes* No, degrees.
And the “Big Brother of the Year” Award goes to…
Jason: Hey, buddy, how’ve you been?
Damian: Life stinks.
Jason: *grins and pats him on the back* Cheer up! You’re still a kid.
Jason: It gets much worse. *winks*
Jason: *catching his breath* Look, I’m sorry I lost my temper.
Damian: I’m sorry you slipped on dog crap when you were chasing me.
Jason = 0, Damian and Titus = 1.
Batman: Where is Jordan?
The Flash: He’s… not here.
Batman: How come? I told him I was coming.
The Flash: That’s probably why he’s not here.
Batman: Where is Jordan?
The Flash: He’s… not here.
Batman: How come? I told him I was coming.
The Flash: That’s probably why he’s not here.
Dick: *cuddling a febrile Damian*
Dick: He’s just going to sleep anyway, and I’ll keep an eye on him, so you can go.
Jason: I don’t know. It doesn’t feel right just abandoning the brat when he’s sick.
Dick: *grins* Congratulations. Now you know what it feels like to be a parent.
Jason: Yeah. How inconvenient.
Because it’s canon that Dick and Damian have a semi-paternal bond (and that Jason cares about his brothers).
In Robin’s bedroom…
Jason: *checking out Damian’s book collection*
Damian: Todd, can I have some privacy, please?
Jason: For what? You’re eleven.
Damian: That’s close to puberty.
That one time Superman wasn’t fast enough to do Robin’s homework…
Bruce: I assume you finished reading “Lord of the Flies” for your book report?
Dick: Mm-hm.
Bruce: Oh, good. How did you like it?
Dick: I thought it was… a timeless American classic.
Bruce: I see. So tell me, what is it about?
Dick: You mean the book?
Bruce: Yes, the book.
Dick: It’s called “Lord of the Flies”. And it’s about a really big fly that all the other flies pray to.
So, no more secret adventures with Clark for a while, Dick. You’re the son of the World’s Greatest Detective.
Also, Jason would’ve been able to answer all those questions without batting an eyelash.
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