source: the big bang theory – Page 23 – incorrect-batfamily-quotes

When another superhero/vigilante hits on Spoiler during a mission…

Cass [to Steph]: Doesn’t he know you have a boyfriend?

Barbara: Oh, she doesn’t have a boyfriend. She has a Tim.

Tim: *tightening his tie and straightening out his double-breasted suit in front of a mirror*

Tim: I’m going to the movies with Tam. I don’t want her to think I think it’s a date.

Jason: Do you think it’s a date?

Tim: *clipping his cuff links and shining his black Oxford shoes* No, but she might think I think it’s a date, even though I don’t.

Jason: Or you might think she thinks you think it’s a date, even though she doesn’t.

Tim: *grooming his hair* Are we overthinking this?

Jason: *handing him a bouquet of roses and a box of chocolates* Not at all.

If you ever wonder what Red Hood watches on TV in his spare time…

After an intense sparring session in the Batcave:

Jason: *panting* Come on, Timmy. I’m exhausted. And Tyra Banks says that the most important item in your make-up bag is a good night’s sleep.

Signs that your little brother’s not so little anymore…

At Red Hood’s safe house-warming party:

Damian: Todd, can I bring girls here?

Jason: You? Sure. Bring as many as you want.

Damian: Okay.

Jason: Just not against their will.

Practicing for his Batfamily reunion stand-up routine…

Tim: What do Damian and a black hole have in common? They both suck.

And he’ll say it with a straight face, too.

When your master hacker of a brother sets up the fastest Wi-Fi ever in his bedroom…

Jason: Hey, Timbo, did you change your Wi-Fi password again?

Tim: Yes, it’s “Jason, get your own Wi-Fi”. No spaces.

Robin [to Raven]: Just keep in mind, should you ever need a slightly apathetic, tertiary friend, I stand at the ready.

Sleepovers at the Kent Farm be like…

Damian [to Jon]: I’m prone to night terrors, so if I wake up kicking and screaming, don’t panic. Just pin me down and stroke my hair, and I’ll be fine.

And need he mention that if you tell any of this to his older brothers, he’ll plant kryptonite around your property and not tell you where to find them?

Commentating for a remote control-motivated scuffle between your two younger brothers be like…

Jason: Tim’s going all alpha-nerd on Damian’s ass!

Mornings at the Manor…

Jason: *cooking pancakes*

Dick: *doing a headstand and using his feet as hands* Blueberry, Jay!

Alfred: *slapping Dick’s feet away from the kitchen counter* Same, Master Jason.

Bruce: *reading the Gotham Gazette* Hn. Same.

Tim: *pouring a fizzing liquid from one test tube to another* Same.

Damian: -Tt-

Jason: Okay, so the same for everyone, with extra spit on Damian’s.