When the Justice League get stranded on a power-dampening island…
The Flash: This isn’t Gilligan’s Island! We can’t just take a couple of coconuts and make a dialysis machine.
Batman:
Tag: source: scorpion
Why no one likes playing chess with Bruce Wayne…
Supercomputer: *makes a move*
Batman: Now I’m stumped.
Supercomputer: 😏
Batman: There are three ways that I can beat you, but I don’t know which one to use.
Supercomputer: 😳
Batman: You know what? I’ll use the pawn. They never get to be the hero.
Supercomputer: 😤
Red Hood: *struggling to disarm motion-triggered, exploding handcuffs with a lock-pick*
Red Robin: *swiftly removes his handcuffs once the henchman leaves the room and starts working on Jason’s*
Red Hood: What th-
Red Robin: Remember when you called me a “nerd” before? Get ready to apologize.
Overheard from somewhere in the Manor…
Tim: You cross me on this, I’ll go online, and in less than an hour, I will erase you!
Footsteps: *heavy*
Door: *slams shut*
Red Robin: I have never committed a crime in my life.
Red Hood: Well, you did hack into NASA.
That awkward moment when you bring your best friend to meet other superheroes and they’re not exactly digging his vibe…
Batman: *walking away mid-conversation*
Superman: *sheepishly scratching the back of his neck as the others stare at him with raised eyebrows*
Superman: Uh… He’s uncouth but effective?
Green Lantern: *coming to Batman’s defense* Did you hear the gravel in that voice? He’s our guy!
Be-extra-ware, villains…
Batman: I take it personally when someone goes after my own.
That awkward moment when you bring your best friend to meet other superheroes and they’re not exactly digging his vibe…
Batman: *walking away mid-conversation*
Superman: *sheepishly scratching the back of his neck as the others stare at him with raised eyebrows*
Superman: Uh… He’s uncouth but effective?
Confession booth at the Manor (as suggested by a family therapist)…
Red Hood [to the camera]: So… I say stupid things to hide the feelings you already know I have…
Nightwing: *staring at broken frames with pictures of Batman and Jason as Robin in them*
Red Hood: *shrugs* We deal with stress differently. You reminisce. I smash things.
– • – • – • – • –
Like you weren’t crying like a baby while doing it, Jay.
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