Roy: You’re my best friend, but you are a terrible person to talk to about personal stuff.
Jason: Thank you. That means a lot to me.
Tag: source: parks and recreation
There’s always that one son during fancy dinners at luxurious Gotham City restaurants…
Jason [to waiter]: I’ll have a glass of your most expensive red wine mixed with a glass of your cheapest white wine served in a dog bowl. Silly straws all around, please.
Bruce: *groans*
Introducing himself to other superheroes be like…
Batman: Hi. My name is Batman. I am Superman’s work-proximity associate.
In which Clark gives him a side-glare. “What he meant to say was best friend and closest confidante.”
Wally: Earlier, I was licking icing off my finger and, boom! I swallowed my wedding ring.
Linda: *sighs*
Because speedsters enjoy eating a lot more than everyone else.
Artemis: Your family has made you a more patient and empathetic person, Jason.
Red Hood: You take that back!
Oh, come on now. You know you wuuuvs ‘em, Jay.
When your best friend misses you and wants to hang out but you’re exhausted from patrol and really just not in the mood…
Tim: Metropolis has a lot of stuff and people, but I like to nothing and hang out with no one, so no, thank you, Kon. And I love you, but no, thank you.
When your eldest brother gives you advice on how to deal with your nasty youngest one…
Tim: I’m perfectly civil, Dick! He’s the stupid, garbage-head, doodoo-face!
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *drinking coffee, watching as his children gather in a small circle in the kitchen*
Tim: So, hands in.
Jason, Steph, Duke: *put their hands one on top of the other over Tim’s*
Tim: Defeat that little brat Damian on three! 1, 2, 3!
Bruce: *spits out coffee*
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
You kids just couldn’t at least let your father finish his coffee in peace, could you?
Damian: I’m awesome at being humble.
You can’t have it all, sweetie. You can’t have it all.
Getting into a fight at a special Justice League appearance for charity be like…
Green Lantern: Bruce, I just want you to know that I am not sorry for pushing your face into a cake.
Batman: Well, I am. For attending a public event.
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