Batman: *enters the room*
Green Lantern (Jessica): … Did you just pee your space-pants?
Green Lantern (Simon): Just a dab.
Batman: *enters the room*
Green Lantern (Jessica): … Did you just pee your space-pants?
Green Lantern (Simon): Just a dab.
When the Titans are scheduled to make an appearance but you just can’t take it anymore…
Kid Flash: I actually have my own charity to attend to: Wally’s Tummy Foundation. *speeds away ala Road Runner*
When your best friend makes the worst puns…
Wally [to Dick]: You’re too beautiful to be funny, dude. It’s not your fault, but you’ve never had to compensate for anything.
Batman/Superman: Teenage AU…
Superteen: Before I save the world, you have to spend the week doing everything I say.
Bat-teen: So, what, I have to be your slave or something?
Superteen: No. You have to be my friend, Bruce.
Bat-teen: Ugh. That’s so much worse.
Arsenal: *watching Bizarro playing with Pup-Pup*
Red Hood: *whispering* His nickname around the safe house is Softypants McHuggable.
Red Robin: *crouching behind the giant coin in the Batcave*
Nightwing: *walks in*
Red Robin: *to his walkie-talkie* The Hug Machine is here. I repeat, the Hug Machine is here. Smiling on all cylinders.
The rest of the Batfamily: *temporarily stop brooding to find hiding places*
Dick tends to get in the way of angst and sadness.
At the Annual Justice League Talent Competition…
Robin: *watches his brothers performing onstage*
Robin: That is my band. I didn’t recognize them without me because I’m the only one that matters.
And this is why they kicked you out, Dami.
Arguing with your best friend be like…
Dick: Well, I dropped my cell phone in a bowl of cereal last week, idiot! If you had called me, you would have known that!
Wally: *raises an eyebrow*
Dick: Oh.
Undercover mission at a Gotham City home for the elderly…
Tim: *whispering* I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to have a weapon in a place full of old people.
Jason: *whispering back* Literally everything is a weapon, Tim. These dentures in my hand are far deadlier than that staff on your back.
In which Jason realizes what he just said, drops the dentures, and squeals like a little girl, almost blowing their cover.
Batman: *studying a case on the Batcomputer*
Nightwing: *parkour-ing from giant memento to giant memento in the Batcave*
Red Hood: *aiming at the bats with his guns (”What? For target practice!”)*
Red Robin: *rambles on about his Multiverse theories to Bruce while dragging around an IV stand with a pouch of pure liquid caffeine*
Batgirl: *taking a selfie while Spoiler braids her hair*
Robin: *approaching Alfred with Batcow in tow (”I need more pet food, Pennyworth.”)*
Lark: *Snapchatting everyone while ducking to avoid Dick (”Typical Tuesdays”)*
Batman: *finds it hard to focus, stops typing*
Batman: *looks at the chaos that is his children*
Alfred: *serves Bruce some tea*
Batman: Alfred, this is like a waking nightmare of happiness.
Alfred: *grins and walks away*
Orphan: *hugs Bruce’s neck from behind*
Batman: *grins as his daughter skips away to join the fray*