Mornings at the Manor…
Damian: *pouring Tim a cup of coffee*
Tim: Is that poison?
Damian: It’s decaffeinated, Drake.
Tim: Oh, are you trying to kill me?
Tag: source: fairly legal
When you’re just trying to be Gotham City’s antihero…
Civilian: Hey, you’re the criminal and drugs guy!
Red Hood: That doesn’t sound like flattery.
Beast Boy: When I’m the most mature person in a conversation we’re in big trouble.
The Flash [to Green Lantern, about Batman]: Great. The one person who can really help us thinks you’re the biggest jackass in the Multiverse.
At the safe house…
Buzzer: *buzzes*
Roy: *checks the security camera feed to see who’s outside*
Roy: *sees Batman*
Roy [to Jason]: Do you want me to let him know that you’re too sarcastic to see him right now?
When you kicked some serious ass during patrol but are late for school the next day…
Tim [to teacher]: So, I, um, found this defect on my alarm clock. It’s called a “snooze button”.
Green Lantern: That cold tone of your voice, does that come naturally? Or is that something you practice?
Batman: I practice. Every time I talk to you.
Because almost any excuse is plausible in the Multiverse…
At a Justice League meeting…
Batman: *glaring*
Green Lantern: What? I got held up.
Batman: What is it this time, Jordan? Traffic, gunpoint, giant squid?
Green Lantern: *shrugs* All of the above.
Mornings at the Manor…
Damian: *pouring Tim a cup of coffee*
Tim: Is that poison?
Damian: It’s decaffeinated, Drake.
Tim: Oh, are you trying to kill me?
Commissioner Gordon: *smoking peacefully on the GCPD rooftop*
Batman: I need your advice on a personal matter.
Gordon: *drops his cigarette, startled by the voice coming from the darkness*
Gordon: *panting* That fills me with a mix of curiosity and terror.