Alfred coming back from vacation be like…
Alfred: So, did he behave himself while I was gone?
Tim: That depends. Are you talking about the frowny one with the hard shell? Or do you mean Damian?
Tag: source: elementary
Red Hood [to Batman]: When the Justice League asked you to join them, did they tell you that you’d be an asset or just an ass?
When you see Bruce having breakfast while reading a newspaper at eight in the morning…
Dick: Bruce, are you feeling okay? You’re acting… normal.
Superman: Who’s to say what’s true and what isn’t?
Batman: Me.
Isn’t this canon, though? I mean, all those times in the comics when Bruce figured out that he or other superheroes were being brainwashed or that things weren’t what they appeared to be?
Asking Damian to pass the gravy during dinner be like…
Damian [to Tim]: You speak idiot?
Batman [to the rest of the Justice League]: If anybody has a problem with how I utilize all the tools at my disposal, be it Superman, my Robins, or the coffee machine, there’s the door. Back to work.
Tim: That’s the beauty of the internet: 24-7 access to everything from twerking kittens to criminal records.
Why one must reconsider before questioning the Batman…
Batman: It doesn’t matter when I made the assumption, all that matters is that I was right.
Because there ain’t no stopping the World’s Greatest Detective…
Dick: You’re going to harass a teenage boy at his father’s memorial? While he’s mourning?
Bruce: If he’s the killer, then he won’t be mourning.
Alfred: Master Bruce is addicted to being Batman.
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