Jason: Why do you have a monkey?
Damian: It’s an animal that looks like a child, Todd. Why don’t I have ten of them?
Bruce might as well convert the Batcave into a zoo.
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Dick: Note to self: Add “Eat, Pray, Love” soundtrack to workout mix.
When your best friend’s one of the nicest people in the Multiverse…
Wally [to Dick]: You even work too hard at passive aggression.
Yeaaaaah, just don’t mess with his family and friends. Especially his adoptive father.
Duke: I just spent the last few years thinking that you guys knew more than me about life, and I just found out that you guys are just as dumb as me.
Jason: Da doi.
Tim: Yeah. Da doi.
Why his family doesn’t know whether to believe him or not anymore…
Red Hood: Oh, I’m serious, baby. I am Yahoo! Serious. I’m Serious FM. Welcome to the World Serious of Seriousness sponsored by Honey Nut Seerios.
[in Yoda’s voice] The sarcasm is strong with this one.
The Flash: *staring at Batman* How old is he again?
Green Lantern: *shrugs* Fifty-something, I guess. He has a landline and uses the world “album”.
Wrong. He’s over 75 years old.
When your adoptive father keeps secrets from you…
Nightwing: Well, I don’t like being excluded, Bruce! Do you, Timmy? Little D? Jay?
Red Hood: Yes!
He’d really rather stay out of it.
At the Wayne Manor attic…
Dick: *dramatically walks out from behind a dusty, old cabinet wearing his 80’s Nightwing suit*
Jason: *clears his throat loudly*
Tim: *standing absolutely still but with shoulders shaking*
Damian: *jaw drop*
Duke: *eyes wide, covering his mouth*
Dick: You guys think I’m some sort of a joke!
Jason, Tim, Damian, and Duke: *break into a fit of laughter*
Jason: *wiping tears off his eyes* This isn’t disproving that theory.
When you’re discussing the bad habits of superheroes and no one wants to consider your input…
Robin: Everyone just wants you to shut up, Todd.
Red Hood: And yet I won’t. Case in point.
Reasoning with a fifth dimension imp about your best friend be like…
Kid Flash [about Nightwing]: In what war is he a criminal? In the battle for our affections?!?
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