Reconciling with your best friend (and trying to play it cool) be like…
Jason: So, how about we make a couple of ground rules.
Roy: Actually, that sounds good. Okay, no hugs.
Jason: Wouldn’t want one. No apologies.
Roy: Wouldn’t accept one.
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Having an overbearing son be like…
Bruce: I thought I told you to stop reading my e-mails.
Damian: Well, I thought I told you to stop keeping secrets!
Sneaking into a criminal mastermind’s lair on a remote island be like…
Superboy: *shudders* Creepy.
Robin: I don’t know… Add more bats and a dinosaur and this is my father’s cave.
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *e-mailing the Justice League while discussing Wayne Tech plans with Lucius on the phone*
Dick: *stealthily picking blueberries off the pancakes on the serving tray while dangling upside down from the ceiling*
Alfred: *slapping Dick’s hand away while preparing Tim’s morning espresso shots*
Jason: *holding up a bag of catfood so it’s out of Damian’s reach*
Damian: *on his tippy toes trying to reach it while muttering censor-worthy threats to Jason*
Tim: *eyelids drooping and eyes red, wiping dried-up slobber off his face* How long was I out? Is Napster still a thing?
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
Who’s gonna tell him?
Their New 52 “break up” be like…
Red Hood: It’s not you, it’s me.
Arsenal:
Arsenal: It’s you.
Snapchats at the Manor…
Camera: *focuses on what looks like a leather seat, then on buttons with bat symbols on them, then on something glinting red*
Red Hood: *places his phone on the dashboard, takes off his helmet, winks at the camera, then bites into a Big Belly Burger* It’s Wednesday. Sometimes I eat in Batman’s car. Don’t tell him.
Because it’s not easy being a Speedster…
Bart: Can we stop walking in slo-mo now?
Tim: We’re walking in slo-mo?
Snapchats at the Manor…
Camera: *focuses on what looks like a leather seat, then on buttons with bat symbols on them, then on something glinting red*
Red Hood: *places his phone on the dashboard, takes off his helmet, winks at the camera, then bites into a Big Belly Burger* It’s Wednesday. Sometimes I eat in Batman’s car. Don’t tell him.
When your older brother’s more protective than usual during patrol…
Red Robin: *shaking his head and smirking*
Red Hood: Mother Hen? Dude, I think we’re about the same age.
Red Robin: Sure, unless time is linear.
Red Hood: I’ll make your face linear!
Red Robin: *rolls his eyes* That doesn’t make any sense.
Red Hood: I’ll make your face make sense!
Red Hood: *fondly watching Starfire braid Artemis’ hair and Arsenal fly around the safe house on Bizarro’s back*
Red House: *sighs happily* What is it about me that makes broken people flock to me? Is it my height? Do huddled masses mistake me for the Statue of Liberty?
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