At the Justice League Awards…

Superman: … And the “Young Justice Mentor of the Year” is… *opens envelope*

Wonder Woman: Batman!

Crowd: *mixture of boos and cheers*

Batman: *goes to the podium*

Batman: Hn. This is not my fault. I tried to be a jerk.

When you fall asleep during a mission briefing at the Watchtower and need to catch up…

Kid Flash: *nudges Kyle*

Green Lantern: *nudges Wally*

Batman: *working on a case at the mainframe computer*

Kid Flash: *clears throat*

Green Lantern: Can I ask a follow-up question, Mr. Batman, Sir?

Batman: You’re about to leave through that window.

Green Lantern: I rescind my follow-up question.

Visiting Wayne Manor and encountering one of Batman’s sons be like…

Clark: Good morning, Jason. Have you seen Bruce?

Jason: Maybe.

Clark: Sooo… Is he around?

Jason: *shrugs* Could be.

Clark: Could you… find him for me?

Jason: Yeah, sure, I could. But wouldn’t it be more fulfilling for you if you did it yourself?


I guess you could just save yourself the frustration and use your X-ray vision, Clark… if the walls weren’t lined with lead.

Things you’d expect by now given the Robins’ lifestyle…

Red Robin: *cradling a bleeding foot*

Nightwing: You’re gonna be okay, Tim. A lot of people get by with nine toes.

Red Hood: I’m getting by fine with eight.

Superboy: *in kryptonite-lined handcuffs* Damian, I’m handcuffed!

Robin: Relax, Kent. Handcuffs are a cinch.

Superboy: Really?

Robin: Yeah. There’s a bone in your thumb. Tiny bone. Really easy to break. What you’re gonna want to do is you’re gonna want to apply torsional pressure to it until it snaps.

Superboy: I’m not gonna break my bone!

Robin: Well, in that case, you are screwed.

When Nightwing’s away, the other Robins will play…

Jason: *holding a bound, gagged, and very bored-looking Damian upside down* Permission to drop the little twerp into a deep, dark hole, Sir?

Tim: Granted.

Damian: -Tt-