Planning a surprise birthday party for the Darkest of Knights be like…
Dick [to the rest of the Batfamily]: It’ll cheer Bruce up! He’ll be over the moon. He may even lean back in his chair and nod slightly.
Cue the stoic look on Alfred’s face and the bewildered, skeptical or mischevious one on everyone else’s.
Bruce: Tim, please keep an eye on Jason today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get himself arrested.
Tim: Sure. I’d love to see Jason get arrested.
Bruce: Try again.
Tim: I will stop Jason from getting arrested.
Bruce: Correct.
Damian: Drake.
Tim: Brat. The bet ends today. Are you ready?
Damian: I was born ready.
Tim: To lose? The whole question was, “Are you ready to lose?” and you said you were born that way.
Damian: Twist my words all you want.
Tim: Okay.
Damian: I’m winning this bet.
Jason: What bet? What’re you guys talking about?
Dick: Seriously? The bet? They’ve been keeping score all year. It comes up all the time. What are you doin’ all day?
Jason: Nothin’. Why, you wanna hang out?
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: Pretty hungover?
Jason: Shhhhh… Turn off your mouth siren…
The Batboys discussing how Bruce may have sustained his latest arm injury…
Jason: No. He did it doing something he’s embarrassed by. Like smiling.
Discussing the Gotham City rogues…
Red Hood [to the rest of the Batfamily]: … But Joker’s, like, the worst of those guys.
Red Hood: Extortion, terrible breath, murder.
Red Hood: I put terrible breath too high on that list.
Bruce: Tim, please keep an eye on Jason today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get himself arrested.
Tim: Sure. I’d love to see Jason get arrested.
Bruce: Try again.
Tim: I will stop Jason from getting arrested.
Bruce: Correct.
Infiltrating a high-security criminal base…
Nightwing [to the rest of the Batfamily]: I know you’re all tired, but don’t forget why we’re here.
Red Hood: Because we’re dedicated detectives.
Nightwing: Because Jason jumped the gun.
Jason: How are we going to get past them without a gun fight?
Tim: I’ll tell you how John McClane would do it. The vents.
Jason: Ah, blast the A/C, they get chilly, they leave to find sweaters.
Tim: No, we’re gonna climb through them.
Jason: Even better. Classic use of vents.
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