When Red Hood and Arsenal were approached by the government regarding Task Force X…
Amanda: The information you’re about to hear is top secret. Unauthorized publication or leaking of this information would be an act of high treason, for which you would be tried and convicted by a secret military tribunal and summarily executed.
Amanda: So, no, Mr. Harper, I don’t think a selfie would be appropriate.
When you wake up strapped to the back of your brother’s motorcycle after being infected by Scarecrow’s fear toxin…
Red Robin: Just curious. What happened between your safe house and right now?
Red Robin: Well, you were hysterical, Tim, so I thought the best thing to do would be to inject you with a tranquilizer, drive you to a private air field, put you on a stolen plane, fly you overnight to Gateway City, and then… that brings us to now.
At a Batfamily mission briefing…
Red Robin [about a grounded Robin]: Why is he even in this briefing? He’s not allowed to go on missions!
Batman: Because he always stows away somehow.
When your heavily sleep-deprived, case-obssessed brother hasn’t even changed his clothes in three days…
Jason: *loudly slurping a milkshake*
Tim: *pauses from typing on the Batcomputer*
Jason: *burps loudly*
Tim: *grits teeth* You know what I don’t have time for?
Jason: *wipes his mouth sloppily with the back of his hand* Shopping for clothes?
Red Robin: Oh, so suddenly you don’t have a death wish?
Red Hood: Timmy, I’ve never had a deathwish. It’s just that I don’t believe that I personally even can die. Again.
The Batboys discussing how to save Batman, who’s being held captive by Bane…
Red Hood: Don’t worry about me, I’m –
Nightwing: – not going on another stupid rampage!
Red Hood: Well, maybe a limited rampage.
Nightwing: No!
Red Hood: Modified limited rampage?
Red Robin: *runs hand through face in frustration* Jason.
Robin: *strapping on a variety of weapons and explosives on his body*
Robin: Don’t worry about our methods.
Selina [to Bruce]: And all the other stuff aside, physically, you’re an amazing human being.
Selina: And all the other, other stuff aside, I actually do love you.
Jason dons the Red Robin costume (again) to mock a sleep-deprived Tim…
Tim: Identity theft is not a joke, Jason! Millions of families suffer every year!
Why Jason doesn’t wake up like regular people…
Tim: *nudges a sleeping Jason to move for more space on the couch* Jason…
Jason: Wuzzat?!
Jason: Wait, wait, huh, huh? What?
Tim: You okay?
Jason: *exhales* Yeah. Sorry. For a second I – I thought I was just now coming out of a coma from when I drowned saving your life eight months ago.
Jason: *sighs*
Jason: Am I just now coming out of a coma from when I drowned saving your life eight months ago?
Tim: No.
Jason: Hmm.
Jason: Timmy, am I just now coming out of a coma from when I drowned saving your life eight months ago?
Tim: No.
When you’ve gotta go rescue your eldest brother…
Red Hood: Well, I guess that settles that! I mean, it’s not like we can just waltz into enemy territory and… Well, I certainly can’t.
Robin: Can’t? Or won’t?
Red Hood: Both, either, all! They’d shoot me on sight, Little D.
Red Hood: And if you want Big D so damn bad, you can go get him your–
* sound of Batmobile tires screeching *
Red Hood: Huh. I didn’t think he’d actually do it.
—
Really, Jay? You thought Dami was beyond doing something like that?
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