Bruce: Because I don’t want it in the Batmobile.
Jason: Well, what do you want me to do, Bruce?
*Jason holds up a used airsickness bag*
Jason: Just throw it out the window?
Bruce: *through gritted teeth* Obviously.
Jason: Oh.
*Jason throws the bag out the car window, hitting Damian*
Damian: TODD!
Jason: Ha, ha!
Tag: source: archer
Mission in the Alps be like…
Red Robin: *snow-covered and shivering* H-how c-c-could y-you possibly be th-that excited t-to be in a freakin’ a-avalanche?!
Red Hood: *shrugs* I have… kind of a weird bucket list.
When your super best friend could give Saran wrap a lesson…
Batman: *ignores vibrations coming from his pocket*
Wonder Woman: How many times a day does Clark text you?
Batman: Hrrrn.
Batman: Just… 40.
When you’re trying to get work done but your sons decide that the Batcave is the ideal place for a squabble…
Jason: Well, what’s the word for you, Tim? You freaked out when I said “replacement”!
Tim: Imagine that!
Jason: You imagine it!
Bruce: *slams his fist on the Batcomputer*
Bruce: Both of you! Imagine. Shutting. Up.
Batman: *glaring* Have I made myself clear?
Red Hood: You’re looking for the answer “Yes”.
Batman: *grits teeth* Yes.
Red Hood: Then, “yes”.
Sometime during Nightwing’s “Brothers in Blood” story arc…
BPD Police Officer: Excuse me, I am effecting an arrest!
Red Hood: Great. While you’re at it, arrest him.
Officer: Who?
Nightwing: *angrily screaming at Red Hood while jumping out of an eighth-story window*
Red Hood: *smirks* If for nothing else, that outfit.
Penguin: Get me out of here alive, and the ransom money, and we’ll call it even, okay?
Red Hood: Uh, we’re way more than even.
Penguin: How do you figure?
Red Hood: Because your final thought on this Earth wasn’t about how my gun tasted!
Penguin: Fair enough.
Arsenal: Right?
The true story behind Tim’s “death” in Detective Comics #940…
Jacob: Putting aside why you’d want to fake your own death –
Tim: Because I have to get away from my family! They’re a seething cauldron of dysfunctional, chaotic, neurotic, narcissistic, quasi-incestuous megalomaniacs!
At a Wayne Foundation charity gala…
Selina: What sort of daily expenses does a billionaire vigilante incur?
Bruce: Batarangs?
Selina: Daily.
Bruce: Or, I don’t know, maybe a surf and turf dinner at the Iceberg Lounge?
Selina: Uh-huh?
Bruce: And then maybe a room upstairs at the East End Regal Hotel?
Selina: Uh-huh.
Bruce: And then, maybe…
Selina: *gets up to leave* I’m gonna leave you here. Between hope and despair.
Why Gotham’s criminals abhor Red Hood…
Dr. Strange: … Or you could just ask me, the man who graduated from Gotham Medical School, summa cum laude.
Red Hood: With a minor in Spanish Bragging.
Dr. Strange: That was Latin.
Red Robin: He knows.
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