When your best friend tells you that you can’t see each other anymore…
Arsenal: Are you saying that our entire relationship is based on lies?!
Red Hood: Not our entire relationship. Just the stuff that I said.
Tag: roy harper
When you’re strapped for cash…
Roy: What if we roll pennies and go to the dollar store?
Jason: That’s good, Roy. Get all the terrible ideas out of your system.
Roy: You’re dead inside? Don’t worry, it’ll get better, man.
Jason: Okay, you’ve literally forgotten the meaning of the word “literally”.
He is kinda right, though. You also literally got better, Jay.
Arsenal: Hey, Jaybird, I’m ho–
Red Hood:
Red Robin:
Arsenal: *jaw drops*
Red Hood: Uh. Sorry. You must be freaked out.
Arsenal: Oh, watching my zombie housemate talk to his brother’s ghost? That’s just what I call a Tuesday.
Oops. Did he forget to mention that Timmy’s back?
Sorry, guys. In my mind, Jason and Roy are still best friends and therefore still share a safe house in Rebirth.
When word on the street is that you’re a “zombie”…
Roy: Jaybird, whose brain have you eaten?
Jason: Who wants to know?
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *scurrying around the kitchen, opening and closing cupboards, looking under kitchen counters and chairs*
Tim: *typing on his laptop, drinking pure liquid caffeine*
Jason: I have to tell you something. When we fell on really hard times, Roy and I stayed at a rat-infested motel for a month, and I developed a deep-seated fear of rats.
Tim: *not looking away from laptop* I am so sorry to hear about that. I understand your fears and I validate them.
Jason: I’m not looking for your understanding, Tim! Just grab the freakin’ rat!
At the safe house…
Doorbell: *buzzes*
Jason: *sighs* It’s Morse code. It’s Damian.
Roy: How do you know?
Jason: Because the doorbell just said, “It’s me, morons”.
Arsenal: Word of advice: Do not mention Jason to Jason or he will shoot you.
Why you don’t try to psychoanalyze your best friend…
Roy: What’re you afraid of, Jaybird?
Jason: I’m afraid of what I’m gonna do to you if you don’t shut up.
And don’t tell me that Roy didn’t ask this while lying belly down on Jason’s bed with his chin propped up by both hands and his bent legs crisscrossing in the air.
Being Red Hood’s wife be like…
You: Jason, honey, when you’re talking to me about the fifty thousand dollars worth of ammo you and Roy just bought, don’t smile like that.
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