arguablysomaya:

jason: in my defense, i was left unsupervised.

bruce: wasn’t dick with you?

dick: in my defense, i was left unsupervised, too.

jewishnightwing:

8 year old Dick: uncle Clark, how high could you throw me?

Bruce, flustered: Dick, no. We’ve spoken about this.

boreddcposts:

Bruce: I’m going to count to ten.

Dick: …

Jason: …

Bruce: …

Dick: Are- are you counting in your head?

Bruce: Yeah.

Jason: What number are you up to?

Bruce: Seven.

Jason: Oh

Dick and Jason: *scramble to run away from Bruce*

comicalage:

Tell Me…Do You Pee Your Pants?

incorrectbatfam:

Tim: Bart has no survival or self-preservation instincts. I think he was born without them.

Conner: That can’t be true.

Tim: Watch this.

Tim: Hey Bart! Race you downstairs!

Bart: *jumps out of a three-story window*

firstfandomfangirl:

remember: if a character isn’t 100% confirmed to be dead then they are still alive

Jason: rubbing his chin But even if they were…

Tim: Will you just give it a rest already?

jasxntxddx:

Bruce: I don’t have favorites.

Dick: Then how come Duke has an allowance?

Tim: Duke gets an allowance? How come I never got one?

Damian: Because you’re rich too, genius.

Steph: How come I didn’t get an allowance?

Dick: Do you even live here?

Jason: He gets an allowance? I had to pay to be here!

Alfred: That was a swear jar, there is a difference.

dick badly explaining the red hood to his friends

halcyonbatfam:

donna troy: hold up, jason todd?

wally west: isn’t he dead?

dick grayson: he died but he’s fine.

hahahaharlequin:

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Trying to eavesdrop on Bruce and Alfred be like…

Dick and Jason: *peering through a vent in the Manor*

Dick: They’ve been in there a while.

Jason: Yep.

Dick: Can’t be good.

Jason: Nope.

Dick: Think they’re talking about me?

Jason: No, I think they’re talking about me.

Dick: Yeah. That makes way more sense.

Alfred and Bruce talking about dinner plans until they realize someone was listening in on them through the vents:

Bruce: They’ve been in there a while.

Alfred: They certainly have.

Bruce: Can’t be good.

Alfred: Of course it isn’t, Master Bruce.

Bruce: Think they’re conspiring against us?

Alfred: No, sir, I suppose they are planning on getting some blackmail material on you.

Bruce: Yeah. That makes sense.