Mornings at the Manor…
Tim: *covering a bruised eye*
Dick: *hugging him consolingly*
Jason: *heading to the refrigerator to grab an ice pack while trying to suppress his laughter*
Bruce and Alfred: *glaring disappointedly*
Damian: *guarding a platter of tofu* It’s not my fault I’m bad at sharing! I skipped kindergarten!
Tag: mornings at the manor
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *scurrying around the kitchen, opening and closing cupboards, looking under kitchen counters and chairs*
Tim: *typing on his laptop, drinking pure liquid caffeine*
Jason: I have to tell you something. When we fell on really hard times, Roy and I stayed at a rat-infested motel for a month, and I developed a deep-seated fear of rats.
Tim: *not looking away from laptop* I am so sorry to hear about that. I understand your fears and I validate them.
Jason: I’m not looking for your understanding, Tim! Just grab the freakin’ rat!
Jason: Hey, Alf, could you pass me that can of beer?
Alfred: Master Jason, it’s breakfast.
Jason: … And a piece of toast?
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: *sulking*
Bruce: *reading the business section of the Gotham Gazette*
Alfred: *taking Tim’s groggy face out of a cup of coffee he was trying to drink*
Jason: *cooking waffles while whistling an 80’s tune*
Damian: *doing one-finger push-ups with Alfred the Cat on his back*
Dick: I know I’m the only one in this house who actually drinks milk, but would it kill any of you to make sure it’s actually on the grocery list?
Mornings at the Batcave…
Tim: *downing a cup of espresso* Okay, we all know why we’re here, right?
Dick: *still in just boxer shorts, yawning and shaking his head*
Jason: *groans* No. Why?
Tim: To fight Damian, the bully. That tiny tween has been tormenting all of us for years, and I for one am sick of it! I can’t promise you victory. I can’t promise you good times. But the one thing I do know –
Dick and Jason: *head back to the Manor*
Tim: Whoa! Whoa! I promise you victory! I promise you good times!
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *whistling while turning on the stove and beating eggs in a bowl*
Red Robin: *comes in through the kitchen window, bruised, tattered, and dripping blood*
Red Robin: Jay! I lost Damian! What am I going to do?!
Jason: Uhhhh. Don’t worry. Don’t worry. *looks around the kitchen in panic* Know what I’m going to do? I’m going to make you an omelet.
Red Robin: Just help me look for him!
Jason: Are you sure? I make ‘em with four kinds of cheese.
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim and Damian: *bickering at the breakfast table*
Bruce: Quiet, you two! If I hear one more word, Tim doesn’t get to drink coffee and Damian doesn’t get to go on patrol.
Tim: Bruce!
Damian: Father!
Bruce: Not. One. Word.
Tim and Damian: *start insulting each other by lightly tapping spoons and banging salt and pepper shakers*
Bruce: I thought I told you two to knock it off.
Tim: We didn’t say anything!
Damian: Not one word!
Bruce: Well, no Morse code either.
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: *chowing down three separate bowls of cereals, talking with his mouth full* Why do people eat anything besides breakfast food?
Damian: *looking on disgustedly as milk and fruit bits splatter onto Dick’s shirt* Because people are idiots, Grayson.
When Alfred leaves for a vacation…
Dick: *scouring the kitchen cabinets for cereal*
Jason: He left some snacks in the freezer for us.
Damian: You mean the frozen mice for the piranha?
Jason: No, the blueberry slurpy pouch.
Tim [to Dick]: *rolls his eyes* He means the ice pack.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
They must’ve missed the note Alfie stuck on the freezer door: “Young masters, for when you are incapable of behaving yourselves and are in need something to put over your or your brother’s black eye.”
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *whistling while pouring coffee into his mug,*
Bruce: *patting Titus on the head and letting Alfred the Cat use his leg as a scratching post*
Bruce: *grinning while looking out the kitchen window*
Alfred:
Dick:
Tim:
Damian:
Jason: It’s like he’s had a personality transplant. Now he’s happy?
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 