Mornings at the Manor (and Alfred’s on vacation)…
Tim: Jay, the frying pan is on fire!
Jason: Son of Jor-El! Everybody stay calm!
Tag: mornings at the manor
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *scurrying around the kitchen, opening and closing cupboards, looking under kitchen counters and chairs*
Tim: *typing on his laptop, drinking pure liquid caffeine*
Jason: I have to tell you something. When we fell on really hard times, Roy and I stayed at a rat-infested motel for a month, and I developed a deep-seated fear of rats.
Tim: *not looking away from laptop* I am so sorry to hear about that. I understand your fears and I validate them.
Jason: I’m not looking for your understanding, Tim! Just grab the freakin’ rat!
Mornings at the Manor…
Damian: *staring out the kitchen window*
Damian: *grins to himself*
Alfred: Master Damian, your food’s ready.
Jason: No, no, what are you doing? He’s both happy and quiet. It’s like seeing a unicorn and Bigfoot at the same time.
Mornings at the Manor…
3:30 AM…
Jason: *yawns*
Jason: *turns on kitchen light*
Jason: *heads to the refrigerator to get some milk*
Jason: You’re up early.
Tim: *hanging upside down from the ceiling*
Tim: *staring blankly ahead*
Tim: That would be assuming that I went to sleep.
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *e-mailing the Justice League while discussing Wayne Tech plans with Lucius on the phone*
Dick: *stealthily picking blueberries off the pancakes on the serving tray while dangling upside down from the ceiling*
Alfred: *slapping Dick’s hand away while preparing Tim’s morning espresso shots*
Jason: *holding up a bag of catfood so it’s out of Damian’s reach*
Damian: *on his tippy toes trying to reach it while muttering censor-worthy threats to Jason*
Tim: *eyelids drooping and eyes red, wiping dried-up slobber off his face* How long was I out? Is Napster still a thing?
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
Who’s gonna tell him?
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *brushes his teeth*
Jason: *pauses*
Jason: *exasperated sigh*
Jason [to Dick]: You’re flirting with your reflection again. Cut it out.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
And that is why “NEW BATHROOM – Jason” is a suggestion found in the Wayne Manor Home Improvement suggestion box (set up by Alfred).
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim: *screams from the kitchen* OH, NO!!!
Dick: *bursts out of his room* Oh, no, what???
Tim: *with crumbs all over his face* I did it again. I was sleep-eating. That explains that dream.
Mornings at the Manor…
Alfred: *decorating pancakes with whipped butter and blueberries*
Dick: *eating cereal while doing a one-armed handstand*
Jason: *throwing bacon bits at Dick’s face*
Tim: *enters the kitchen*
Damian: What’s that smell? *sniffs the room*
Everyone else: *stops to sniff*
Damian: Smells like sweat and anger and shame.
Tim: *with dark rings under his eyes*
Tim: *pours coffee onto the wrong end of his mug*
Tim: *sighs* Yep.
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: *pours Damian a cup of coffee* Sugar?
Damian: Yes, ten lumps, please.
Tim: *with bloodshot eyes and shaking uncontrollably* Hey, Golden Boy, top me off!
Dick: Are you sure Alfred still lets you drink coffee, Tim?
Tim: FOR THE LAST TIME, YES!!!
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
And for the last time, Timothy, no.
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *whistling while turning on the stove and beating eggs in a bowl*
Red Robin: *comes in through the kitchen window, bruised, tattered, and dripping blood*
Red Robin: Jay! I lost Damian! What am I going to do?!
Jason: Uhhhh. Don’t worry. Don’t worry. *looks around the kitchen in panic* Know what I’m going to do? I’m going to make you an omelet.
Red Robin: Just help me look for him!
Jason: Are you sure? I make ‘em with four kinds of cheese.
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