Mornings at the Manor…
Tim: *drinking his twelfth cup of coffee* If Jerry the Turkey didn’t belong in the oven, then why did he fit?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
In which Dick and Jason race to save their little brother’s beloved pet (lest the War of the Century begin in the Wayne household).
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *scurrying around the kitchen, opening and closing cupboards, looking under kitchen counters and chairs*
Tim: *typing on his laptop, drinking pure liquid caffeine*
Jason: I have to tell you something. When we fell on really hard times, Roy and I stayed at a rat-infested motel for a month, and I developed a deep-seated fear of rats.
Tim: *not looking away from laptop* I am so sorry to hear about that. I understand your fears and I validate them.
Jason: I’m not looking for your understanding, Tim! Just grab the freakin’ rat!
Mornings at the Manor…
Damian: This is a black kale-chia smoothie.
Jason: Why are you drinking that? Did you lose a bet or something?
Tim: Do you have an infected lesion?
In which Damian takes his breakfast elsewhere.
Mornings at the Manor (and Alfred’s on vacation)…
Tim: Jay, the frying pan is on fire!
Jason: Son of Jor-El! Everybody stay calm!
3 AM at the Manor…
Jason: *leaning on Tim for support*
Jason: *giggling and whispering* Timbo, take me to Alfred and move slow…
Jason: … I’m still drunk… ing my coffee, Bruce!
Bruce: Hn.
Guess who’s grounded?
Mornings at the Manor…
Damian: *walks into the kitchen and sees Tim splayed on the kitchen counter, bruised and bloodied, and in a singed Red Robin uniform*
Damian: Pennyworth, do we have to put the trash on the counter? I take my afternoon tea here.
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *drinking coffee, watching as his children gather in a small circle in the kitchen*
Tim: So, hands in.
Jason, Steph, Duke: *put their hands one on top of the other over Tim’s*
Tim: Defeat that little brat Damian on three! 1, 2, 3!
Bruce: *spits out coffee*
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
You kids just couldn’t at least let your father finish his coffee in peace, could you?
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim: *groans* My insides are dying.
Jason: *drinks milk directly from the carton* So, not fine?
That’s what you get when you’ve had nothing but coffee and energy drinks for the last 48 hours, Timmy.
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: *chowing down three separate bowls of cereals, talking with his mouth full* Why do people eat anything besides breakfast food?
Damian: *looking on disgustedly as milk and fruit bits splatter onto Dick’s shirt* Because people are idiots, Grayson.
Mornings at the Manor…
Duke: *nervously looks over his shoulder at Bruce pulling a sneering Damian by the scruff of the neck, Dick restraining a furious Tim via bear hug, Alfred telling Jason to get down from the kitchen counter, Cass ushering the family pets to safety, and the refrigerator on fire*
Duke: *sips chocolate milk, then looks straight into the Snapchat camera*
Duke: Jason attacked the counter with a fire axe and is still only the second craziest person in the kitchen.
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