Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *scouring the refrigerator*
Dick: *balancing a spoon on the tip of his nose while tiptoeing atop a kitchen stool*
Alfred: *picking up all of Dick’s fallen cutlery*
Tim: *fast asleep and drooling on his pancakes*
Damian: *tossing a “hay salad” for Batcow*
Jason: Ish iz anybody’sh shandwich? Because I’ve eaten half of it and I don’t like it.
You clearly don’t, Jay, based on that turkey scrap dangling from your mouth.
Tag: mornings at the manor
Mornings at the Manor…
3:30 AM…
Jason: *yawns*
Jason: *turns on kitchen light*
Jason: *heads to the refrigerator to get some milk*
Jason: You’re up early.
Tim: *hanging upside down from the ceiling*
Tim: *staring blankly ahead*
Tim: That would be assuming that I went to sleep.
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim: *wiping the sleep from his eyes and yawwwwwwniiiing*
Dick: *in a contorted bodily position beyond human understanding* Hey, Timmy. Want to do yoga with me?
Tim: Um, let me just have some coffee first, and then I’ll have the strength to tell you how much I won’t be doing that.
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim: *covering a bruised eye*
Dick: *hugging him consolingly*
Jason: *heading to the refrigerator to grab an ice pack while trying to suppress his laughter*
Bruce and Alfred: *glaring disappointedly*
Damian: *guarding a platter of tofu* It’s not my fault I’m bad at sharing! I skipped kindergarten!
Mornings at the Batcave…
Tim: *downing a cup of espresso* Okay, we all know why we’re here, right?
Dick: *still in just boxer shorts, yawning and shaking his head*
Jason: *groans* No. Why?
Tim: To fight Damian, the bully. That tiny tween has been tormenting all of us for years, and I for one am sick of it! I can’t promise you victory. I can’t promise you good times. But the one thing I do know –
Dick and Jason: *head back to the Manor*
Tim: Whoa! Whoa! I promise you victory! I promise you good times!
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim and Damian: *bickering at the breakfast table*
Bruce: Quiet, you two! If I hear one more word, Tim doesn’t get to drink coffee and Damian doesn’t get to go on patrol.
Tim: Bruce!
Damian: Father!
Bruce: Not. One. Word.
Tim and Damian: *start insulting each other by lightly tapping spoons and banging salt and pepper shakers*
Bruce: I thought I told you two to knock it off.
Tim: We didn’t say anything!
Damian: Not one word!
Bruce: Well, no Morse code either.
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *whistling while turning on the stove and beating eggs in a bowl*
Red Robin: *comes in through the kitchen window, bruised, tattered, and dripping blood*
Red Robin: Jay! I lost Damian! What am I going to do?!
Jason: Uhhhh. Don’t worry. Don’t worry. *looks around the kitchen in panic* Know what I’m going to do? I’m going to make you an omelet.
Red Robin: Just help me look for him!
Jason: Are you sure? I make ‘em with four kinds of cheese.
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: All right, brat. I’ll give you back your tofu, but first you have to forgive me and treat me like a brother.
Damian: No.
Jason: All right, then just give me back my breakfast.
Damian: *pauses from giving Batcow the omelette and glares at Jason*
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Ya started it, Jay.
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: Hey, hands off my pickle, brat!
Damian: I don’t see your name on it, Todd!
Jason: No, but – *grabs the pickle and licks it*
Damian: Oh, yeah? *grabs it back and dunks it in his milk* Checkmate.
Jason: Huh. Always thinking two moves ahead.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Quit playing with your food, kids.
Mornings at the Manor…
Dick: *pours Damian a cup of coffee* Sugar?
Damian: Yes, ten lumps, please.
Tim: *with bloodshot eyes and shaking uncontrollably* Hey, Golden Boy, top me off!
Dick: Are you sure Alfred still lets you drink coffee, Tim?
Tim: FOR THE LAST TIME, YES!!!
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
And for the last time, Timothy, no.
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