Raising a Robin…
Bruce: Alfred, Jason’s having girl troubles. You’d better go talk to him.
Alfred: It’s clown troubles, Sir. That’s your responsibility.
Bruce: I thought I was in charge of bedtime stories and “dying pets”?
Alfred: Yes. Well, we’re adding clowns.
Bruce: Hn. Fine. But you just bought yourself “ear piercing” and “strange new feelings”.
Tag: jason todd
Meirl
Imagine: The Batkids cleaning the manor – before Alfred leaves and after he does.
Damian [on the Comm Link]: Todd, I broke my last saxophone reed, and I need you to get me a new one.
Red Hood: *reloading his guns while hiding behind barrels as bullets whizz past him* Uh, isn’t this the kind of thing Alfred’s better at?
Damian: I called him. He’s not home. I also tried Father, Grayson, Drake, Brown, Thomas, and the Commissioner, Barbara’s father.
Red Hood: *twisting a criminal’s arm and throwing another across the wall* Wow, and after them, out of all the people in the world, you chose me.
When you finally realize that you’re officially part of the Batfamily…
Duke: I don’t think I’m really cut out for a job where you disarm a bomb, steal a classified document, and then jump off a building.
Jason: *supportively pats him on the shoulder* Well, you could have fooled me.
Duke: That’s very kind of you to say, but I’m pretty sure my girlish screams in the face of danger give me away.
Jason and Tim: *watch as Tam walks away*
Jason: *elbows Tim in the ribs and gives him a “Why didn’t you talk to her???” look*
Tim: *rubbing his chest and hissing* Of course I find her attractive! It’s just that I had a burrito earlier and I was trying to be respectful.
Red Hood: I don’t really do well with change, I guess.
Batman: Well, you’re better than I am.
Red Hood: The pyramids are better at change than you are.
Red Hood: … It’s a joke! Hey, I was being affectionate.
Tim: I’m going to go talk to Bruce right now because I am emotionally mature.
Jason: Show off.
Aboard one of Black Mask’s private planes…
Pilot: *looking out the window* What’s he doing?
Red Hood: *suction-cupped to the plane door, destroying it with his fists*
Co-pilot: He’s being Red Hood.
Red Hood and Red Robin: *wounded, out of weapons, and crouching behind crates as armed henchmen close in on them from every corner*
Red Hood: *grins*
Red Robin: Jason, “I could take out those guys” isn’t a plan.
Recently discovered Lazarus Pit side effects…
Red Hood: I was a dead, alabaster bad-ass, Alf!
Alfred: I am performing open-heart surgery on you without anesthesia, Master Jason. You are beyond “bad-ass”.
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