Discussing ways to win your father’s sympathy be like…
Red Hood: How about this: I throw a corpse dressed like me off the roof –
Red Robin: *looks into the camera like he’s on “The Office”*
Tag: jason todd
When Alfred leaves for a vacation…
Dick: *scouring the kitchen cabinets for cereal*
Jason: He left some snacks in the freezer for us.
Damian: You mean the frozen mice for the piranha?
Jason: No, the blueberry slurpy pouch.
Tim [to Dick]: *rolls his eyes* He means the ice pack.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
They must’ve missed the note Alfie stuck on the freezer door: “Young masters, for when you are incapable of behaving yourselves and are in need something to put over your or your brother’s black eye.”
When the U.N. wants to publicly acknowledge your family’s contribution to saving the world…
Batman: I need you to promise me that you’ll be on your best behavior.
Red Hood: I kind of promised other people that I’d be on my worst behavior, and I gave ‘em my word, so…
Red Hood: Hey, Timbo. How would you rate me as a vigilante, on a scale of one to three?
Red Robin: Uhhhh, two?
Red Hood: That’s, like, the second to the last thing I wanted to hear.
Family Patrol Night…
Nightwing: *stares questioningly at his brothers after hearing about a mission gone awry*
Red Robin: *wiping soot off his face and picking shrapnel from his uniform* Chalk that one up to Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum over there.
Red Hood: *scraping dried mud off his combat boots*
Robin: *throwing the shards that used to be his sword into a garbage can* -Tt-
Nightwing: Uh… Who are they?
Red Robin and Robin: THEY’RE BOTH JASON!
Family Patrol Night…
Nightwing: *stares questioningly at his brothers after hearing about a mission gone awry*
Red Robin: *wiping soot off his face and picking shrapnel from his uniform* Chalk that one up to Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum over there.
Red Hood: *scraping dried mud off his combat boots*
Robin: *throwing the shards that used to be his sword into a garbage can* -Tt-
Nightwing: Uh… Who are they?
Red Robin and Robin: THEY’RE BOTH JASON!
Overnight visits at the Manor be like…
Jason: Well, goodnight, Little D.
Damian: Oh, goodnight, Todd. Sleep tight. There’s a bus schedule underneath your pillow.
Dick: *walks past Tim and Damian’s shared bedroom*
Dick: *hears loud thuds, scraping noises and muffled insults*
Dick: *knocks gently on the door* How’s it going in there?
Tim & Damian: GO AWAY!
Jason: *lights a cigarette by his doorway across from theirs* Wow. They kinda harmonized on that. Cool.
Robin: Well, you need to move fast, Todd!
Red Hood: Well, here I was, about to move at a sloth-like pace and get myself captured.
While Nightwing recuperates from a nasty encounter with Red Hood…
Tim [to Dick]: Remind me to beat some sense into our brother once you’re healthy.
Damian [to Tim]: Remind me to remind you to get in line.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
They’re pretty protective of their eldest.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 