Listening to Dick and Kory argue for about the hundredth time on their road trip…
Gar: *drinking the Capri Sun that Kory stuffed in his sweater pocket* Are you picking up on the chemistry that’s going on?
Rachel: *rummaging through the backpack that Dick packed for her* It’s like they’re married.
While waiting in the mini van…
Rachel: *watching Dick and Kory, who’re outside in the freezing cold, have a heated argument about where to head to next*
Gar: *sighs* I know, Rach. I hate it when Mommy and Daddy fight.
With a fORK
Wally: *instantly regretful of his word-vomit* I gotta bribe you to keep you quiet?
Dick: I don’t call it a bribe. I call it cereal.
Dick: *not losing eye contact with @dangerous-doodle while tenderly skewering the tiny, dehydrated, bat-shaped marshmallows with the tines one. By. One.*
dick grayson: Come on, I wasn’t that drunk last night.
donna troy: You were flirting with Kori.
dick grayson: So what? She’s my wife.
donna troy: You asked her if she was single.
dick grayson:
donna troy: And then you cried when she said she wasn’t.
Wally: *scoffs* Don’t listen to Dick. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. The guy eats cereal with a fork.
he wHAT
Nightwing, fresh from patrol with the Titans: *munching on said cereal* Look *swallows* I didn’t think I had to stop eating this stuff just because, uh… *looks around at all the unpacked boxes in his apartment* Look, I know the spoon’s in there somewhere. Been kinda busy. 🤷♂
Dick: Hey, hey. Maple Loops is part of a nutritious and balanced breakfast.
Wally: Yeah, if you eat it with a steak and some broccoli.
dick grayson: Come on, I wasn’t that drunk last night.
donna troy: You were flirting with Kori.
dick grayson: So what? She’s my wife.
donna troy: You asked her if she was single.
dick grayson:
donna troy: And then you cried when she said she wasn’t.
At the Titans Tower…
Pizza Delivery Guy: Why are all these pizzas piling up?
Dick: Wally West went on a diet.
Pizza Delivery Guy: Oh, crud! I just bought a boat!
That one time Roy got a part-time job at a fast food restaurant…
Dick: What’s your soda refill policy?
Roy: All you can drink, if you buy a jumbo cup.
Wally: Careful, Roy. That’s how I bankrupted a Pizza Hut.
A “cook-in” at your best friend’s apartment be like…
Wally: I got the steak from the freezer. *slams a package onto the kitchen counter*
Dick: Why do you have chocolate on your face?
Wally: It was under a chocolate pie.
Dick: So you ate your way through it?
Wally: I made a judgment call. You weren’t there.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 